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Author Topic: Married life and law school  (Read 19153 times)

TNGA60

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Married life and law school
« on: January 10, 2008, 01:14:57 AM »
So, I am getting married in a little over two weeks and I wanted to know what law school is like for someone who is married. Does it make it more difficult/easier? I think it would be a plus b/c less debt and you have a cheerleader at home. Am I right?

Prog

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Re: Married life and law school
« Reply #1 on: January 10, 2008, 07:18:28 AM »
I would think that the rigors of the first year of law school would put even more strain on the already daunting first year of marriage.

Of course, it all depends on your relationship and the kind of people you and your SO are/will be.

Best of luck!

road

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Re: Married life and law school
« Reply #2 on: January 10, 2008, 09:59:13 AM »
I'm doing it and find it a plus. I've been married a bit longer though (4 yrs) and have kids. It's a plus as long as you keep your marriage a priority. If you're at school til late every night plus weekends plus talk about it all the time at home it will kind of suck for your spouse. If you go home at a reasonable time and leave school behind it'll be better for you since you'll have more balance, won't get sucked into all the on campus anxiety, and can keep it in perspective. So in other words treat law school like a full time job and you'll be fine.
IANAL...Y

areopagite

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Re: Married life and law school
« Reply #3 on: January 10, 2008, 10:11:30 AM »
First of all, congratulations!

Second, I agree with road.  I got married during graduate school and, on the whole, I think that the two experiences went together very well.  It will be important to purposefully make a balance between your school and home life, but it should give you a much better perspective on what you're doing in the classroom and why.  What worked best for me was to treat school like my 8-5 job (or 6-6, as the case may be sometimes).  The time I invested in my relationship with my wife paid off huge in terms of support and understanding (it can be like having a cheerleader, you always know that at least one person thinks you're cool!).

Best of luck to you two!
John Dewey on standardized tests:

"It reminds me of how we weighed pigs on my grandfather's farm.  You lay a board over a fence, put the pig on one end and pile rocks on the other.  Then you guess how much the rocks weigh."

etmerian

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Re: Married life and law school
« Reply #4 on: January 10, 2008, 10:19:43 AM »
Not to mention someone to make you dinner when you're too exhausted and frustrated to even think about it!

I'm getting married in April and my fiance has known that law school was my future since the day we met.  So he's always known that it was top priority and that way I know he's on board 100% even though we both know it'll be rough at times.

Ender Wiggin

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Re: Married life and law school
« Reply #5 on: January 10, 2008, 10:37:04 AM »
My wife is prepared for it.  I think at times it will be more difficult for her, and at times more for me.  It will definitely mean that we will have less time to fully immerse ourselves into some of the extras, which is probably ok.  Like others have said, though, it'll definitely be cool to know that there is someone who supports you through the whole thing.

LSN


Michigan Law Class of 2011

areopagite

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Re: Married life and law school
« Reply #6 on: January 10, 2008, 10:42:00 AM »
I for one predict that I would be a lousy law school student if I were not married.  Though marriage adds a great deal of responsibility which might seem to distract from studies, it is that very responsibility that has enabled me to focus my energies more effectively and to value the opportunities more dearly.
John Dewey on standardized tests:

"It reminds me of how we weighed pigs on my grandfather's farm.  You lay a board over a fence, put the pig on one end and pile rocks on the other.  Then you guess how much the rocks weigh."

Ender Wiggin

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Re: Married life and law school
« Reply #7 on: January 10, 2008, 10:56:33 AM »
I for one predict that I would be a lousy law school student if I were not married.  Though marriage adds a great deal of responsibility which might seem to distract from studies, it is that very responsibility that has enabled me to focus my energies more effectively and to value the opportunities more dearly.

I'll probably be lousy anyway, but at least I have hope this way.  My biggest worry is the extra stuff.  I would like to be able to do at least one night per week of socializing, but that will have to be negotiated. 

Actually, check that.  My biggest worry is that she is going to have a baby at finals time. 

LSN


Michigan Law Class of 2011

MHLM

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Re: Married life and law school
« Reply #8 on: January 10, 2008, 10:58:42 AM »
I for one predict that I would be a lousy law school student if I were not married.  Though marriage adds a great deal of responsibility which might seem to distract from studies, it is that very responsibility that has enabled me to focus my energies more effectively and to value the opportunities more dearly.

I'll probably be lousy anyway, but at least I have hope this way.  My biggest worry is the extra stuff.  I would like to be able to do at least one night per week of socializing, but that will have to be negotiated. 

Actually, check that.  My biggest worry is that she is going to have a baby at finals time. 

Ender,

Weren't you saying your wife is due just a bit after summer start? You did get summer start, correct? That will be a LOT going on. I give you and your wife a ton of credit!

This is, of course, assuming you end up at Mich and not, say, Harvard...

areopagite

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Re: Married life and law school
« Reply #9 on: January 10, 2008, 11:00:41 AM »

I'll probably be lousy anyway, but at least I have hope this way.  My biggest worry is the extra stuff.  I would like to be able to do at least one night per week of socializing, but that will have to be negotiated. 

Actually, check that.  My biggest worry is that she is going to have a baby at finals time.  

lol.  That's great.  We did pretty good with our first and timed it right in the middle of the summer.  Something tells me that karma's gonna kick my ass and the next one will be during finals, too.  But hey, maybe we can get adjoining hospital rooms and take study breaks in between contractions!
John Dewey on standardized tests:

"It reminds me of how we weighed pigs on my grandfather's farm.  You lay a board over a fence, put the pig on one end and pile rocks on the other.  Then you guess how much the rocks weigh."