PRENUP - why is it such a sore topic?

[The Poster]

negotiating a prenup is like going through a divorce, from what i've seen. each side has their own attorney (by law), it can get pretty nasty.

[Sam P. Huntington]

Some people who get divorced regret not having one.  In the "love" stages of a relationship, you are blinded by the fairy tales, till death do us part bullsh*t!  Once you are getting divorce, the Mr Charming is not the same.  He becomes this azzsh*t and before you know it it's too late.  You see him walking away with half your sh*t!

Personally, I ecommend hidding your $$$.  No joint accounts, no joint credit card, buy your house b4 you get married.  Look out for #1 - YOU! You don't want a divorce to ruin your life. 

That whole - if this relationship is forever, why do you need a pre-nup?  It's because the marriage is not guarantee.  Let's be REALISTC!

Assuming there is no prenup, will having separate accounts mean that you keep the money in your account after the divorce?

[The Poster]

negotiating a prenup is like going through a divorce, from what i've seen. each side has their own attorney (by law), it can get pretty nasty.

If your relationship can make it through that, it can make it through anything. Call it a test?

prenups only take care of assets you have before marriage anyhow. anything you earn/inherit afterwards isn't covered, and those are the things most people usually care about.

this is not legal advice.

[«ě»]

Yeah, we're planning to stay together.  I'll be fine with it...I feel like it might be tougher for her.

I can keep her warm in those cold new york nights for you.

[The Poster]

negotiating a prenup is like going through a divorce, from what i've seen. each side has their own attorney (by law), it can get pretty nasty.

If your relationship can make it through that, it can make it through anything. Call it a test?

prenups only take care of assets you have before marriage anyhow. anything you earn/inherit afterwards isn't covered, and those are the things most people usually care about.

this is not legal advice.

I would really prefer to see the teeth and claws before stepping into a legally binding commitment. Fewer surprises later, etc.

it can go both ways, my friend.

[Hank Rearden]

If I were about to marry someone, and I thought, "Hmm, maybe I should get a prenup," I'm probably marrying the wrong person. 

[John Blackthorne]

I don't think there's anything logically wrong with a prenup, but it just seems so cold when you're marrying the love of your life.  It's hard to say to your partner, "We're making a lifelong commitment, but maybe we'll betray our word."

Anyway, we don't have a prenup.  Up until I graduate from law school, he's been the higher income earner.  After that I will be.  But you know, after having supported me through law school, I think he'd deserve something for that.  Just like I think women who make professional sacrifices to be stay-at-home mothers deserve the protection of the law.

...Which 50% arguably doesn't do. Women are harmed far more by marriage than men are -- especially if they have children.

would you please explain your response.  Please.

[....,,.,]

Yeah, we're planning to stay together.  I'll be fine with it...I feel like it might be tougher for her.

I can keep her warm in those cold new york nights for you.

Lol

[Ravynous Elegance]

My bf and I are definitely planning on a prenup...

It'll basically say that anything I acquire during the course of our marriage through inheritance will remain mine - for example my parents beach house. Additionally my parents have things in mine and my sisters name in case of any legal action taken against them (my dad is a doctor) - the prenup will protect that stuff too. Basically, I'd be coming into the marriage with more than he would be... so I'd want to protect that stuff, and he knows he has no claim to any of it. He (currently) wants a prenup as well, he basically said he'd make me sign one to protect my assets just in case.

He also wants a clause that says something to the affect of "if adultery is to blame for the dissolution of the marriage, the adulterer gets less than 50% of assets acquired during the marriage" I don't know how much less than 50% but since I don't think it (cheating) will be an issue for me... what do I care.

[The Poster]

My bf and I are definitely planning on a prenup...

It'll basically say that anything I acquire during the course of our marriage through inheritance will remain mine - for example my parents beach house. Additionally my parents have things in mine and my sisters name in case of any legal action taken against them (my dad is a doctor) - the prenup will protect that stuff too. Basically, I'd be coming into the marriage with more than he would be... so I'd want to protect that stuff, and he knows he has no claim to any of it. He (currently) wants a prenup as well, he basically said he'd make me sign one to protect my assets just in case.

He also wants a clause that says something to the affect of "if adultery is to blame for the dissolution of the marriage, the adulterer gets less than 50% of assets acquired during the marriage" I don't know how much less than 50% but since I don't think it (cheating) will be an issue for me... what do I care.

prenups can't do this. at least not in any state i am aware of. you can only dispose of assets you have before you get married, not things you inherit or earn after you are married.