Law School Discussion

PRENUP - why is it such a sore topic?

Re: PRENUP - why is it such a sore topic?
« Reply #210 on: July 15, 2007, 07:19:36 PM »
::swims through thread::

Alamo

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Re: PRENUP - why is it such a sore topic?
« Reply #211 on: July 15, 2007, 07:55:15 PM »
the only thing i can think of
I guess this is where it went wrong.

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that too. so what other legal rights is he talking about?

Visitational rights in hospitals
Power of medical decisions
Combined health insurance and sick leave from employers
Rights to inheritance in the case of death without a will (or even in addition to a will)
Several taxation benefits
Creditor protection of marital home
Financial benefits or support if spouse becomes dead or disabled

I really can't be arsed going on with this list. If you do not know that marriage grants literally hundreds of legal rights and powers, both federal and state, you probably shouldn't post in a thread regarding the issue.


we already ruled those out a few pages ago, remember? most of those things can be taken care of with other means (wills, health care proxies, durable power of attorney, joint tenancy in a deed, etc.).

Uhm, certainly pretty much everything can be taken care of in a contractual society, I don't see what that has to do with the fact that these things are inherent in a marriage.

Because marriage isn't about all of the inherent contractual obligations, it's about a union founded upon love.

flyaway

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Re: PRENUP - why is it such a sore topic?
« Reply #212 on: July 15, 2007, 09:22:55 PM »
the only thing i can think of
I guess this is where it went wrong.

Quote
that too. so what other legal rights is he talking about?

Visitational rights in hospitals
Power of medical decisions
Combined health insurance and sick leave from employers
Rights to inheritance in the case of death without a will (or even in addition to a will)
Several taxation benefits
Creditor protection of marital home
Financial benefits or support if spouse becomes dead or disabled

I really can't be arsed going on with this list. If you do not know that marriage grants literally hundreds of legal rights and powers, both federal and state, you probably shouldn't post in a thread regarding the issue.


we already ruled those out a few pages ago, remember? most of those things can be taken care of with other means (wills, health care proxies, durable power of attorney, joint tenancy in a deed, etc.).

Uhm, certainly pretty much everything can be taken care of in a contractual society, I don't see what that has to do with the fact that these things are inherent in a marriage.

Because marriage isn't about all of the inherent contractual obligations, it's about a union founded upon love.

Seriously.  This is pretty much the point I've been trying to make to the people who don't understand why anyone would not want a prenup without being a gold digger.  But I don't think they want to understand.  They just want to write off everyone who sees marriage differently than they do as an idiot or evil.

People approach marriage from different viewpoints and think about it different ways, just like they do about every other life choice.

When I got married, I made a commitment for the rest of my life.  I didn't make a commitment for the rest of my life, but only if it works out.  Preparing for the possibility of divorce changes the entire nature of the commitment.  Maybe that's naive or idealistic, but marriage *is* idealistic.

n/a

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Re: PRENUP - why is it such a sore topic?
« Reply #213 on: July 16, 2007, 12:49:42 AM »
This logic is similar to you declining on health insurance because you make a commitment to be healthy the rest of your life. 

Just as there are aspects of your health that you do not control, so too are there these aspects of marriage--namely your partner.

Anyone who would pass on health insurance and take the risk of being totally F-ed financially would be seen as idiotic; I cannot fathom how someone could pass on a prenup and risk the same kind of monetary shellacking.


I understand the idealistic comment, but I dont think I would ask someone who couldnt take a step back and look at the decision logically without tying in emotion to marry me in the first place, so I guess it is a non-issue pour moi.

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Re: PRENUP - why is it such a sore topic?
« Reply #214 on: July 16, 2007, 06:27:01 AM »
Preparing for the possibility of divorce changes the entire nature of the commitment.  Maybe that's naive or idealistic, but marriage *is* idealistic.

It's not naive or idealistic, it's dumb. Sorry, but there's no other word. It's like the other guy said, not getting health insurance because you're not planning to get sick.

Alamo

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Re: PRENUP - why is it such a sore topic?
« Reply #215 on: July 16, 2007, 06:45:20 AM »
Preparing for the possibility of divorce changes the entire nature of the commitment.  Maybe that's naive or idealistic, but marriage *is* idealistic.

It's not naive or idealistic, it's dumb. Sorry, but there's no other word. It's like the other guy said, not getting health insurance because you're not planning to get sick.

No, YOU'RE dumb.  Seriously, is this the level to which we've descended?  You kids don't have any respect for anyone or anything nowadays.

And if you don't believe that the bond of holy matrimony is intrinsically different from the bond between you and your health insurance provider, then I don't know what to say to you.

flyaway

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Re: PRENUP - why is it such a sore topic?
« Reply #216 on: July 16, 2007, 07:18:42 AM »
Preparing for the possibility of divorce changes the entire nature of the commitment.  Maybe that's naive or idealistic, but marriage *is* idealistic.

It's not naive or idealistic, it's dumb. Sorry, but there's no other word. It's like the other guy said, not getting health insurance because you're not planning to get sick.

If you really think that's a good analogy, 1. either you're the dumb one, or 2. you really don't get the concept of marriage.

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Re: PRENUP - why is it such a sore topic?
« Reply #217 on: July 16, 2007, 07:19:41 AM »
You kids don't have any respect for anyone or anything nowadays.
Perhaps that is a good thing

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And if you don't believe that the bond of holy matrimony is intrinsically different from the bond between you and your health insurance provider, then I don't know what to say to you.
Pretending like marriage is something that it isn't will not make it become that illusion.  It's dumb to go into something this important with such a naive attitude. Simply said.

flyaway

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Re: PRENUP - why is it such a sore topic?
« Reply #218 on: July 16, 2007, 07:27:30 AM »
Maybe that's not what marriage is to you, but it's exactly what marriage is to me and my husband. 

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Re: PRENUP - why is it such a sore topic?
« Reply #219 on: July 16, 2007, 07:38:16 AM »
I'm sad to hear that. If marriage to you rejects the reality of divorce, I find that somewhat worrying.