Q: What do you call a lawyer gone bad?
Q: Whatís the difference between a lawyer and an onion?
A: You cry when you cut up an onion.
Q: What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 70?
A: Your honor.
Q: What do you throw to a drowning lawyer?
A: His partners.
Q: How can you tell when a lawyer is lying?
A: His lips are moving.
Q: What do you have if three lawyers are buried up to their necks in cement?
A: Not enough cement.
Q: What's the difference between a lawyer and a vulture?
A: The lawyer gets frequent flyer miles.
Q: What do you get when you cross a bad politician with a crooked lawyer?
A: Chelsea Clinton
Q: If you have a bad lawyer, why not get a new one?
A: Changing lawyers is like moving to a different deck chair on the Titanic.
Q: How does an attorney sleep?
A: First he lies on one side and then on the other.
Q: Whatís the difference between a shame and a pity?
A: If a busload of lawyers goes over a cliff, and there are no survivors, thatís known as a pity. If there were any empty seats, thatís a shame.
Q: What's the difference between a lawyer and a leech>
A: When you die, a leech will stop sucking your blood and drop off.