Law School Discussion

Just wanted someone to talk to ... don't read if you don't care ...

noell.sweet

This last post from swifty has got thinking strongly about stuff ... (if you don't know what I'm talking about see here, and my last post too, please: )

http://www.lawschooldiscussion.org/prelaw/index.php/topic,8151.0.html

I was just thinking about things ... like, I've worked so hard to get where I'm at now ... and I've only managed to lower my debt by $10,000.  Does that mean I've failed?  I dunno ... and, I dunno if I can go to law school, most likely I will need loans, which will raise that debt some more.  I am OK with that, because I really want to go to law school, I want to learn in an intellectually stimulating environment.  But, I'm kind of losing my willpower on life in general.  I mean, I do something as a joke, after something was suggested to me.  And then I get comments like I'm trying to work for my money, and I'm asking to pay for more things than I originally asked for ... and that hurts.  I am not a conceited person.  Really ... I just thought it was funny, because of that website with the chick asking for donations so she could pay off her SHOPPING debt. So, I made a parody of it.  And then *OTHER* people were promoting it.  :-\  And now, I am really hurt.  I was already planning on paying everyone back ... I just ... I need to post here in case someone is out there.  Help me understand something ... why do people just assume things before getting all the facts and whatever?  Why do people try to be cruel and harsh to each other?  Why would a mother not want her own child just because a father is a coward to walk out her?  Why would one's own family member, flesh and blood, use another family member to better themselves while hurting the other one at the same time?  Why?

Why am I trying to kid myself to think I am good enough as you guys, who did well in college and are good test takers, who haven't had a life such as mine?  Why do I think that Lewis and Clark Law School will accept me into their law school?  Why do I think I belong here when I was always told that I didn't belong anywhere?  What did my uncle mean he said that I was a "mistake" and "shouldn't have been born"?  What makes me think that I can actually afford law school, even though I want to go so badly?  :-\

You really DON'T have to answer any of these questions, I just needed to vent, get them off my chest or whatever ... so I can stop crying and get to work, and get through today.   I have the whole weekend to be depressed, but today I can't be ... anyway ... thanks for listening ... if you don't care, that's fine ... if I get flamed, or called a liar, that's fine too.  But I *AM* telling the truth, that's why it hurts so much ... <sigh>

lexylit

Re: Just wanted someone to talk to ... don't read if you don't care ...
« Reply #1 on: September 10, 2004, 10:35:49 AM »
noelle, just get through the workday and youll have all wknd to relax. people are quick to judge b/c really it's an internet chat board; don't let anyone hurt you. just take this whole thing one step at a time-- the first step is the lsat. you're on top of it. you're a rockstar. do not panic.

noell.sweet

Re: Just wanted someone to talk to ... don't read if you don't care ...
« Reply #2 on: September 10, 2004, 10:37:52 AM »
Thanks lexy ...  :)

junebug

Re: Just wanted someone to talk to ... don't read if you don't care ...
« Reply #3 on: September 10, 2004, 10:39:12 AM »
Noell,
You are just as good as anyone else on this board.  Good grades and high LSAT scores do not make a person "good".  If law school is what you really want (and it sounds like it is), you'll find a way to attend and pay for it.  Even if you accumulate a lot of debt, it's still possible.  I have friends who are almost 200k in debt b/c they went to med school and now they don't even want to be physicians.
If anything, the struggles that you went through will make you a stronger candidate and I'm sure there are admissions people out there who will see that.  

dr_draino

Re: Just wanted someone to talk to ... don't read if you don't care ...
« Reply #4 on: September 10, 2004, 10:40:27 AM »
AMEN.  Swifty is a 40 yr. old who lives with his mom and drives to the corner store in the pooring rain (and in fact BECAUSE its raining) with a .34 blood alcohol...

You are justified, we wouldn't have given money if we didn't think you were justified or didn't think you would be able to kick-ass on the LSAT and afterwards make a good attorney.

noelle, just get through the workday and youll have all wknd to relax. people are quick to judge b/c really it's an internet chat board; don't let anyone hurt you. just take this whole thing one step at a time-- the first step is the lsat. you're on top of it. you're a rockstar. do not panic.

noell.sweet

Re: Just wanted someone to talk to ... don't read if you don't care ...
« Reply #5 on: September 10, 2004, 10:43:12 AM »
I just hope you are right ...  :)

You are justified, we wouldn't have given money if we didn't think you were justified or didn't think you would be able to kick-ass on the LSAT and afterwards make a good attorney.

noelle, just get through the workday and youll have all wknd to relax. people are quick to judge b/c really it's an internet chat board; don't let anyone hurt you. just take this whole thing one step at a time-- the first step is the lsat. you're on top of it. you're a rockstar. do not panic.

thechoson

Re: Just wanted someone to talk to ... don't read if you don't care ...
« Reply #6 on: September 10, 2004, 10:44:55 AM »
Noell, you are a f-ing tool if you let this *&^% bother you.  Toughen up, cause if you have this attitude forever, you really shouldn't go to law school cause you'll get eaten alive.  And in life in general, too.  Toughen up a bit.  Develop thicker skin.

@#!* what everybody says, and what everybody thinks.  You control your life.  Your decisions. That's the ONLY thing you can control, so make the most of it.

I'm sorry, I'm pretty blunt. I don't think you need anything from us.  You just need to toughen up, and do whatever you want with your life.  Dont worry about that GPA and LSAT or whatever.  All that *&^% is meaningless in the grand scheme of things.

You can always PM or IM me if you need to talk. I'll give it to you blunt, but I think you are a good person and I'll support you.

good luck

foxnewssucks

Re: Just wanted someone to talk to ... don't read if you don't care ...
« Reply #7 on: September 10, 2004, 10:45:16 AM »
Why are you letting some fools bother you?  Did you register for the LSAT yet?  If anything you need to study hard and register for the test you want to take instead of worrying about past grades or what people say on the internet.  If you score in the 160s, you should have a great chance at L&C, and L&C is a great school, with a beautiful campus in a cool city.  So consider yourself lucky.

noell.sweet

Re: Just wanted someone to talk to ... don't read if you don't care ...
« Reply #8 on: September 10, 2004, 10:48:14 AM »
Yep, I'm registered ... I am studying, but I can't study at work, silly.  So I pass the time by reading this board ... oh *AND* working too. lol.

Why are you letting some fools bother you?  Did you register for the LSAT yet?  If anything you need to study hard and register for the test you want to take instead of worrying about past grades or what people say on the internet.  If you score in the 160s, you should have a great chance at L&C, and L&C is a great school, with a beautiful campus in a cool city.  So consider yourself lucky.

Re: Just wanted someone to talk to ... don't read if you don't care ...
« Reply #9 on: September 10, 2004, 10:52:10 AM »
Everyone here who sent you money did it because they love you (I wanted to, then backed out because I don't have a paypal account and don't know a whole lot about online commerce... I'm soooo 20th century).  You make this board a better place.  Don't let anyone tell you otherwise.  If you even brighten up an online room full of people you've never met in real life, I can only imagine you're that much better in person.

You're gone through tough things.  I can relate to a lot of your pain.  I was so introverted growing up, and I had no friends my age, and I just had a guitar and Kurt Cobain hanging on my wall, and I was a stranger in a strange land.  I pulled through, and I've gone through some REALLY trying times in the past year.  I'll just say this: if you believe in yourself and in your own ability to rise above circumstances, and if you don't let anyone's telling you otherwise get you down, you may still crash and burn.  There are no guarantees in life.  But you may not.  And even if you do, you'll be going down in a blaze of glory.  I've been thinking myself a lot about this lately... live with honor, and live courageously.  Do everything on your own terms.  If your own terms don't pan out, never stop trying.  Odds are, something will eventually go your way.  That doesn't help in the short-term... but over the long-haul, it's really comforting to know that the odds are in your favor if you never stop working toward goals and giving life your all.  

Don't let anyone tell you you're not as good as anyone else.  There are people on here with really snotty and superioristic attitudes... sometimes I think it's funny (like when DOWNY does it, or someone I know is joking) but when people say things and you think they're serious, that can hurt.  Don't let it get you down though.  Later in life, that disposition will break them.  One way or another, whether it's because they can't get a job because of their attitude or because they're kings of the world who are cold and empty inside, they'll come to their own brick wall.  That goes the same for people in real life whose negative attitudes toward you (and ultimately, toward their own lives) is getting you down.  

So discount what those jokers have to say, and don't even care about any of that.  Those people are worthless in the long haul, because they're barely human.  They don't care about law as a profession, but there's a lot of will to power in them... misdirected.  Pass them by, and just let them dig their own holes... do your best, and we're all pulling for you.

ZAP