Sad that you aren't considering Michigan since it seems to be great for married couples - lots of family housing at a good price, good city and the Detroit metro area (even if you refuse to work in Detroit, which my spouse would be fine with doing) has plenty of jobs.
Charlottesville has a decent economy, so getting a job there isn't too hard from what I can tell. Of course it depends on the kinds of jobs being considered, which is less of an issue in bigger metro areas. But it's a great small city that I would love to live in.
Durham and the triangle area are awesome places for a family to live, so definitely keep Duke on the list. Even if it pains me to encourage people to go to Duke... the true Tarheel that I am. That area is high on our list for moving to after law school.
Really I don't think you can go wrong, most of the top 14 are in good locations and fine for married couples. It really depends on the kinds of places you want to live and the type of jobs your spouse wants to get. Do some research in his/her field to see. Cost of living is going to be cheaper at Duke, UVA, and to some extent Michigan (though Ann Arbor is not too cheap). Chicago, New York, and the bay area are all pretty expensive but I'm sure all are doable. If you are aiming for a firm job, paying off your debts will not be too hard if you are willing to keep to a more student-like lifestyle for a few years of working. I, on the other hand, was looking for the money and more public interest-minded students so I was picky about schools and am going where the money is. Fortunately it's a great school!