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Author Topic: Relationship Dealbreakers  (Read 17349 times)

->Soon

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Re: Relationship Dealbreakers
« Reply #330 on: May 31, 2006, 10:18:15 AM »
ok, what if it was one of those incurrable std's?

would THAT be a deal breaker?

im thinking yes...
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Statistic

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Re: Relationship Dealbreakers
« Reply #331 on: May 31, 2006, 10:21:01 AM »
Few questions, be honest:

1) Let's say somehow you found out that a person previously had gonorrhea, but went to a clinic and got it cured.  Is this a dealbreaker for anyone?

2) Is sterility/inability to conceive a dealbreaker for anyone?

3) The third question is only for those who consider children a dealbreaker:  If you found out that the person previously did have a child, but gave it up for adoption, is it still a dealbreaker?  Does it change anything if it happened more than once?

1. depends on when i found out. before the relationship - prolly a dealbreaker. during the relationship - not a dealbreaker.
2. Def. dealbreaker. I want kids.
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pikey

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Re: Relationship Dealbreakers
« Reply #332 on: May 31, 2006, 10:34:51 AM »
ok, what if it was one of those incurrable std's?

would THAT be a deal breaker?

im thinking yes...

Incurable STD is a definite dealbreaker.  I am not trying to deal with something for the rest of my life, and as CN mentioned, condoms are not foolproof.

On a related note, I was watching a Law & Order episode last nite about black men on the dl.   There were a group of black men (some married with kids) who had a weekly poker nite and one of them would take the bedroom each week.  They don't bring protection because that would be admitting their intent.  As one of the guys said "I'm not gay, I have relationships with women and sex with men". One of the black guys had sex with a fellow DA (he was white) who fell in love with him and wanted him to leave his wife and kids.  The black DA kills the other DA to prevent exposure.  Turns out they both have AIDS and the black guy has passed it to his wife. Has anyone seen this episode? Any thoughts?
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Re: Relationship Dealbreakers
« Reply #333 on: May 31, 2006, 10:38:59 AM »
yes. and for those that haven't you just ruined it.  :D

But yah, it was a really good episode. It was an SVU episode right? Yah it was. Umm.. I don't know what else to say beyond that.  :)
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Re: Relationship Dealbreakers
« Reply #334 on: May 31, 2006, 10:40:20 AM »
ok, what if it was one of those incurrable std's?

would THAT be a deal breaker?

im thinking yes...

Incurable STD is a definite dealbreaker.  I am not trying to deal with something for the rest of my life, and as CN mentioned, condoms are not foolproof.

On a related note, I was watching a Law & Order episode last nite about black men on the dl.   There were a group of black men (some married with kids) who had a weekly poker nite and one of them would take the bedroom each week.  They don't bring protection because that would be admitting their intent.  As one of the guys said "I'm not gay, I have relationships with women and sex with men". One of the black guys had sex with a fellow DA (he was white) who fell in love with him and wanted him to leave his wife and kids.  The black DA kills the other DA to prevent exposure.  Turns out they both have AIDS and the black guy has passed it to his wife. Has anyone seen this episode? Any thoughts?


I saw it. No thoughts b/c I am so tired of talking about the DL phenomena. I hate the way the media has made it out to be a Black thing when WHITE men do the same crap (anyone remember that governor of New Jersey). Just another way to demonize Black people's sexual behavior.
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Statistic

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Re: Relationship Dealbreakers
« Reply #335 on: May 31, 2006, 10:42:53 AM »
Another question:

If you don't want kids, and the other does - dealbreaker?

If you do want kids and the other doesn't - dealbreaker?
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pikey

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Re: Relationship Dealbreakers
« Reply #336 on: May 31, 2006, 10:46:32 AM »
ok, what if it was one of those incurrable std's?

would THAT be a deal breaker?

im thinking yes...

Incurable STD is a definite dealbreaker.  I am not trying to deal with something for the rest of my life, and as CN mentioned, condoms are not foolproof.

On a related note, I was watching a Law & Order episode last nite about black men on the dl.   There were a group of black men (some married with kids) who had a weekly poker nite and one of them would take the bedroom each week.  They don't bring protection because that would be admitting their intent.  As one of the guys said "I'm not gay, I have relationships with women and sex with men". One of the black guys had sex with a fellow DA (he was white) who fell in love with him and wanted him to leave his wife and kids.  The black DA kills the other DA to prevent exposure.  Turns out they both have AIDS and the black guy has passed it to his wife. Has anyone seen this episode? Any thoughts?


I saw it. No thoughts b/c I am so tired of talking about the DL phenomena. I hate the way the media has made it out to be a Black thing when WHITE men do the same crap (anyone remember that governor of New Jersey). Just another way to demonize Black people's sexual behavior.

Sorry about that spoiler.  Yeah, it was SVU, but with all the reruns I figured anyone who was gonna see it already had.

I think the DL phenomena is different (more prevalent) in the Black community.  Yeah, there are white people who are on the DL, but I'm willing to bet that the percentage of gay black men who are on the DL is a lot higher than the percentage of gay white men on the dl.  Black culture/society is a lot more homophoic than white culture, in general.  Black men are stigmatised and cast aside if they are gay.  To paraphrase another guy in the episode "I could do drugs or go to jail (and it's ok), but being gay would cause me to lose my fan base/popular support".  The DL phenomena will continue until we as a black community becoming more accepting of homosexuality.
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Re: Relationship Dealbreakers
« Reply #337 on: May 31, 2006, 10:48:35 AM »
agreed.
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Re: Relationship Dealbreakers
« Reply #338 on: May 31, 2006, 10:48:39 AM »
any idea why its soo frowned upon?
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Re: Relationship Dealbreakers
« Reply #339 on: May 31, 2006, 10:50:07 AM »
any idea why its soo frowned upon?

blacks are disproportionately social conservatives.
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