Law School Discussion

Poll

Symbol of your love or Big Waste of $$$

Girl - Symbol of your love
55 (31.1%)
Girl - Big Waste of $$$
34 (19.2%)
Guy - Symbol of your love
41 (23.2%)
Guy - Big Waste of $$$
47 (26.6%)

Total Members Voted: 163

Engagment Rings

Texas2L

  • ****
  • 215
  • Texas
    • View Profile
Re: Engagment Rings
« Reply #210 on: May 24, 2007, 09:16:52 PM »
So by falling for the social pressures and hype, you force yourself to get a FAKE diamond ring, and that doesn't make you superficial?

Thats an interesting attempted reversal, but it fails.  Here's why. 

People expect you to have a shiny rock on your hand, virtually all people.  They'll ask you wtf is wrong with you if you didn't buy your wife a ring.  They will not, however, ask you how much the ring cost, so if it only cost you a grand yet it looks like a 30k ring, nobody is the wiser, and you've saved a bundle. 

I suppose you could go full monty and not buy an engagement ring at all - but I'm simply advocating saving money, not bucking the social norm.  Either way is okay, just don't go spend 30 grand on a shiny rock.  :)

Texas2L

  • ****
  • 215
  • Texas
    • View Profile
Re: Engagment Rings
« Reply #211 on: May 24, 2007, 09:24:53 PM »
If I'm going to drop any money at all on a ring for her finger, it'll be because I want to put it there, not because virtually all people expect me to put one there.

This is one of those catch-22's.  Do you want to put a ring on her finger because it makes her happy?  If so, why does it make her happy?  Is it just a nice piece of jewelry or does she feel validated socially and as a woman?  Is it the expectation of the ring and the engagement that makes her feel this way (and you feel good for making her feel this way) or is it that she feels good about it that created the expectation?

I don't know.  Either way, women want rings.  These things happen.

h2xblive

Re: Engagment Rings
« Reply #212 on: May 24, 2007, 09:25:48 PM »
So by falling for the social pressures and hype, you force yourself to get a FAKE diamond ring, and that doesn't make you superficial?

Thats an interesting attempted reversal, but it fails.  Here's why. 

People expect you to have a shiny rock on your hand, virtually all people.  They'll ask you wtf is wrong with you if you didn't buy your wife a ring.  They will not, however, ask you how much the ring cost, so if it only cost you a grand yet it looks like a 30k ring, nobody is the wiser, and you've saved a bundle. 

I suppose you could go full monty and not buy an engagement ring at all - but I'm simply advocating saving money, not bucking the social norm.  Either way is okay, just don't go spend 30 grand on a shiny rock.  :)

One definition of superficial does go something along the lines of "appearing to be true or real only until examined more closely."

I just found your post very ironic.

Pugnacious

  • ****
  • 775
  • C'est law vie...
    • View Profile
Re: Engagment Rings
« Reply #213 on: May 25, 2007, 12:21:52 AM »
So by falling for the social pressures and hype, you force yourself to get a FAKE diamond ring, and that doesn't make you superficial?

Thats an interesting attempted reversal, but it fails.  Here's why. 

People expect you to have a shiny rock on your hand, virtually all people.  They'll ask you wtf is wrong with you if you didn't buy your wife a ring.  They will not, however, ask you how much the ring cost, so if it only cost you a grand yet it looks like a 30k ring, nobody is the wiser, and you've saved a bundle. 

I suppose you could go full monty and not buy an engagement ring at all - but I'm simply advocating saving money, not bucking the social norm.  Either way is okay, just don't go spend 30 grand on a shiny rock.  :)

One definition of superficial does go something along the lines of "appearing to be true or real only until examined more closely."

I just found your post very ironic.

 ;D

ě

  • ****
  • 4497
  • non sequitur
    • View Profile
Re: Engagment Rings
« Reply #214 on: May 25, 2007, 05:39:33 AM »
Man, law students are cheapasses :(

ptown

  • ****
  • 659
    • View Profile
Re: Engagment Rings
« Reply #215 on: May 25, 2007, 07:32:45 AM »
what a b itch, that dude must be a wuss or deformed or something to put up with that crap.



doesnt she know rings need to be sized?  you dont just exchange one that doesnt fit...

It depends, actually.  We had to exchange mine instead of just sizing it down one, because making the curve smaller like that would have messed up the setting.  I just got the exact same thing, even though actually he offered that I could pick out something different.  I'm too sentimental for that.

See, this is how it should be.  She should love the ring because of the sentimentality of it, not necessarily the look.  Not to mention, how can a simple solitaire engagement ring be ugly?  I suppose different people like different cuts and metals, but arn't these things you would know in a long-term relationship?  There are some really guady rings out there I suppose, but certainly the engagement ring isn't the first piece of jewelry that is bought for her.  One would think that the guy has at least a reasonable idea of what style she likes.

And for the record, I agree that the guy in that story is a total b itch about the whole thing as well.  He should stop being such a wuss about it.




->Soon

  • *****
  • 18818
    • View Profile
Re: Engagment Rings
« Reply #216 on: May 25, 2007, 07:41:17 AM »
If she's this picky about a ring, I'm pretty sure she's the type to wear jewelery in general too. If not, she might just be a total female dog - if she doesn't care for jewelery and still goes haywire over this ring.

I don't think anyone would have any clue what ring I would like based on my jewelry.  I wore the same necklace for 9 years (floating star charm) until it broke, and I tend to wear cheap random earrings.  No rings.

But, I would care a lot about my engagement and wedding rings.  So maybe I am in fact a total female dog.

maybe?!?!?!


;D

Re: Engagment Rings
« Reply #217 on: May 25, 2007, 07:42:39 AM »
Even though I bought my wife a real diamond, we laugh about it because of how absurd it is to pay thousands of dollars for a shiny rock. 

Get a zircon or artificial diamond, and put a little extra money into the setting and go on a nicer honeymoon or something.  Big diamonds are a complete waste of money.  Nobody can tell the difference except a jeweler and he'd have to examine it.  IMO, if the fact that you're not wearing a "real" diamond even though nobody can tell bothers you, you might be a superficial person.

See I don't agree with this.  This is the same reason that I don't buy knock-off bags (as in the good ones that you really can't tell are fake).  I'll know it's fake and I don't like rocking fake things.  If I can't afford it, then I'll just get something that I can afford--the same can be said for my future engagement ring.

ě

  • ****
  • 4497
  • non sequitur
    • View Profile
Re: Engagment Rings
« Reply #218 on: May 25, 2007, 07:47:59 AM »
Agreed, fakes are just ridiculous. When it comes to clothing and accessories, a lot of the fake stuff isn't actually fake though. It's quite common that when for example Ralph Lauren orders 100'000 shirts from a factory in Malaysia, they will actually make a 150'000, and after shipping the "real" ones to America and Europe etc, they flood their overproduced items to the "fake" markets around Asia etc. This far from applies to all of these bodegas, don't get me wrong. But it's a common practice, and somewhat silently accepted, as it becomes a part of the 'payment' for the factory, and the designer corporations get away with a cheaper price tag.


That being said, I find this entire idea that as long as you can't tell the difference it doesn't matter if it's real or not. You know the difference, shouldn't that matter? Also, you do not need to be a trained jeweler to see the difference between a real diamond and a zircon. Modern, artificial diamonds can be impressively made, but they are technically not fake either, just not traditional.

I realize it can suck to cough up many thousand dollars for a ring, but it's something she will keep for life and cherish (hopefully). Not to mention, it's a solid investment, unlike buying her a car or taking a trip around the world (as I've seen suggested), the value of jewelery won't perish.

Texas2L

  • ****
  • 215
  • Texas
    • View Profile
Re: Engagment Rings
« Reply #219 on: May 25, 2007, 07:49:52 AM »
See I don't agree with this.  This is the same reason that I don't buy knock-off bags (as in the good ones that you really can't tell are fake).  I'll know it's fake and I don't like rocking fake things.  If I can't afford it, then I'll just get something that I can afford--the same can be said for my future engagement ring.

An argument could be made for the bags because there might be some higher quality materials, better workmanship etc that you're actually getting for your money.  Maybe the name-brand will last longer.  Maybe if it falls apart you can return it, etc - there's tangible benefits as well as the intangible real-brand feel-good.

On the diamond, it's literally a shiny rock.  One shiny rock is the same as another.  There's no objective or subjective difference aside from how much they cost - unless spending the money is the point.  If it somehow validates the relationship in your mind to spend that money on the ring, then so be it.  I'd rather go on a kickass honeymoon or throw a down payment on a new car or something though.