I deleted out of this thread a while ago. Here are some updated classics. By which I mean ramblings which should be discounted:
Penn and Cornell:
1) You're only in the T14 because you're an Ivy and USNews has decided to play along. People correctly assume that you game the rankings more than others.
2) People continually are forced to refer to generic notions of atmosphere and culture in order to not feel bad about turning down money at a school that would have disappointed their parents.
3) People think there's a difference between these schools. Specifically, people at Penn.
1) People think you're in Evanston. Evanston sucks.
2) You're associated with the people who go to Northwestern undergrad.
3) Over half of the nontrads students with work experience that forms that backbone of all of your stats are ultimately those who are seeking a raise, not those with any particular interest in law, making you a b-school backup for those who were pleasantly surprised by their LSAT score.
1) I never learned anything about you because you're too far in the South.
2) I stand by this decision.
3) Duke sucks. UVA, I ain't got no quarrel with you.
1) The only people who would choose to live in Palo Alto over Berkeley are the ones there now and you're stuck with them.
2) I love you and you love me and life is good as long as everyone is white and well off and we don't have to worry about dealing with the real world if we avoid working in it before law school or paying for it while we're here.
3) It's so obvious to everyone that you're at the right school for you that you can't understand why anyone would ever choose otherwise and you pity those who did. It's unclear to you why this is a problem. You're thinking of getting into est.
1) You've sold your soul to the devil and yet you constantly remind everyone that you're not a sellout and that Harvard is not what they think and that you're not going to end up like they always knew you would.
2) So it turns out that the reason you didn't get laid in undergrad wasn't that you couldn't drop the H-bomb after all.
3) There is so much free booze that you post stupid *&^% like this to LSD.