Dad: You better score in the 99th percentile son, or make some other plans for next Christmas.
Mom: Don't worry about your father, he's not serious. I'm sure he'll still love you even if you score in the 98th percentile.
Girlfriend: If you don't score in the 99th percentile, I'm going to dump you because I can't stand being with a loser. No I won't have sex with you.
My dog: Woof. Woof.