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Author Topic: Git You Some Really PIMP ASS Suits! The Jerry Springer Colledge of Law  (Read 680 times)

louiebstef

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Everest Dude: HEY! IMMA TALKIN TO YOU!  WHY YOU JUST BE SITTIN ON THAT COUCH, HOMIE?  YOU NEED KEEP IT REAL...INSTEAD
A GES' TEXTIN' ALL YO FRENS FOR BAIL MONEYWHEN YO COUSIN BEEBEE GOES TO COUNTY.....BE A LAWYER!  DEN YOU KIN GO TO DAT "RAIN THANG" WHERE DA JUDGE BE, AN GIT COUSIN BEEBEE OUT!  YA KNOW...YOU KIN GIT ALL YO HOMIES OUT, TOO.

Everest Dude:  YOU KNOW.  YOU SEE THEM FLY ASS HOMIES ON DEM TV LAW SHOWS?  THAS' RIGHT!  EVEREST IS NOW AFFLIATIN WIT MR. JERRY SPRINGER TA BRING DA LAW TO DA HOMIES!  DA JERRY SPRINGER COLLEDGE OF LAW WANTS YOU!

Everest Dude:  MAN...IT'S EASY.  WHAT YOU WAITIN FO?  YOU KNOW DA ONLIEST READIN YOU DO IS WEN YOU GOT TEXTED.  WHY NOT READ FO DA BIG MONEY, G?  LOOK---AT---THE--SCREEEN---HERE'S DA NUMBA.  CALL IT.  [under his breath] dumb mutha.....

1-800-LAWHOMY

Announcer [speaking softly at 5000 words per minute while fine print is scrolling]:

"The Jerry Springer College of Law is a for-profit Institution of Higher Learning, licensed by the State of California, and Accredited by the Church of Scientology and The Western Conference of Snake Oil Federal Funds Sucking Schools.  No warranty is implied in terms of bar exam performance or employability, both of which have been scientifically determined to be directly related to intelligence and literacy.  Should not be undertaken by those who are pregnant, could become pregnant, can potentially impregnate, or who have numerous impregnations currently subsidized by public assistance.."
"Why be a lawyer? I'm already an ass.  Might as well go professional!"