Guys: How Would You Feel if Fiance Wouldn't Change Her Last Name?

[Sephiroth]

I wouldn't care.  In fact, I'd prefer she keep her last name!  That makes her SEXIER!

If she changes it I think she's trying too hard to be ME! lol

Keep your last name and be confident in who you are!  SH**!

But its up to her of course. 

*A husband taking his wife's last name?  That is unprecedented.  Has anyone ever even done this?  I think not...

[the white rabbit]

In case people reading this don't know, men need respect in a relationship more than love.

Perhaps the amount of respect a man needs from a relationship varies depending on how much respect he gets elsewhere.

[Sephiroth]

Do people in the US take the Woman's name typically?  It seems to be a new "21st Century" thing that  ought to be set in motion now...much like women didn't have the right to vote back then, now they do, and now the new gig is dudes should take their wives' last names.  Haha.

[cmd758]

Joke, right, numitor?

[cmd758]

Aw yes, the "last word" knowing that the other won't respond and saying stuff that in no way counters his statements. Awsome.

Hey, I don't care whether he responds or not. When he talked about my mother, what would I have to say to a person like that besides the fact he is pathetic for dragging my mother into it? Bite me, Numitor. Why do you follow me around and respond to every single one of my posts anyway?

[cmd758]

Also, what do you call saying "oh I won't respond whatever you say." Wow, he really isn't trying to have the last word, is he? Furthermore, all he said was "American women are disrespectful" and "my mom is better than yours" and "I am awesome because I have paid off all my sh** by age 31." That's just the best line of argumentation about why women should continued to be oppressed that I have ever heard. Almost as good as your last post on this thread, Numitor. It is almost as genius as your plan for world peace.

[cooleylawstudent]

Yes, because you are that important that anyone would care enough to "follow you around" see you got banned or ran away. Either way, bye bye. 

[mac n cheese]

That would hurt! The way I see it, there is not an objective correlation between happiness within a marriage and spouse name change. However, the name change symbolizes unity and togetherness which is obviously an issue in the event it doesn't happen. Just to illustrate my point - how would you feel if he expected you to marry him, but didn't give you a ring or a nice wedding ceremony? What if he wanted to skip the ring altogether? What if his idea of a nice wedding was to take you in his car down to the court building and marry you, then afterwards, take you to an all you can eat buffet then drop you off at home before going to work? You'd probably feel like crap because of what those things actually sybolize. On a broader scale, people rarely admit the importance of appearance and how things look to friends, family, and colleagues.
I'd probably react by explaining how important the name thing is. If I had to beg, I wouldn't want to move forward because begging is not cool. If I had to beg about this, then there is no telling what else i'd have to beg for. Just my thoughts. Be good

MaCNCheese

[Haynes7]

Um..I don't really see your point.  Tons of people get married and not everyone has rings or ceremonies.  Take me for example, I kept my maiden name when I was married but I also never got a diamond engagement ring and I did not have a wedding with a fancy dress and a string quartet.

 The ceremony of marriage doesn't interest me particularly.  I understand that some women are into those things but there are women out there who would trade the traditional trappings of marriage just to keep their maiden name.  Plus I don't really see your point because "traditionally" the brides family is supposed to pay for the wedding, all the man has to pay for is the engagement ring and engagement rings can be cheap or super expensive depending on HIS taste.  So the bride loses her name and puts her family in debt to pay for the wedding and you are talking about symbolism and unity.  It seems to me that "traditionally" men are the greater beneficiaries of marriage so stop complaining about what men have to sacrifice for marriage and respect women enough to see that we are not just silly romantic fools but rational creatures capable of sound financial and emotional judgement.   

That would hurt! The way I see it, there is not an objective correlation between happiness within a marriage and spouse name change. However, the name change symbolizes unity and togetherness which is obviously an issue in the event it doesn't happen. Just to illustrate my point - how would you feel if he expected you to marry him, but didn't give you a ring or a nice wedding ceremony? What if he wanted to skip the ring altogether? What if his idea of a nice wedding was to take you in his car down to the court building and marry you, then afterwards, take you to an all you can eat buffet then drop you off at home before going to work? You'd probably feel like crap because of what those things actually sybolize. On a broader scale, people rarely admit the importance of appearance and how things look to friends, family, and colleagues.
I'd probably react by explaining how important the name thing is. If I had to beg, I wouldn't want to move forward because begging is not cool. If I had to beg about this, then there is no telling what else i'd have to beg for. Just my thoughts. Be good

MaCNCheese

[mac n cheese]

Um..I don't really see your point.  Tons of people get married and not everyone has rings or ceremonies.  Take me for example, I kept my maiden name when I was married but I also never got a diamond engagement ring and I did not have a wedding with a fancy dress and a string quartet.

 The ceremony of marriage doesn't interest me particularly.  I understand that some women are into those things but there are women out there who would trade the traditional trappings of marriage just to keep their maiden name.  Plus I don't really see your point because "traditionally" the brides family is supposed to pay for the wedding, all the man has to pay for is the engagement ring and engagement rings can be cheap or super expensive depending on HIS taste.  So the bride loses her name and puts her family in debt to pay for the wedding and you are talking about symbolism and unity.  It seems to me that "traditionally" men are the greater beneficiaries of marriage so stop complaining about what men have to sacrifice for marriage and respect women enough to see that we are not just silly romantic fools but rational creatures capable of sound financial and emotional judgement.   

That would hurt! The way I see it, there is not an objective correlation between happiness within a marriage and spouse name change. However, the name change symbolizes unity and togetherness which is obviously an issue in the event it doesn't happen. Just to illustrate my point - how would you feel if he expected you to marry him, but didn't give you a ring or a nice wedding ceremony? What if he wanted to skip the ring altogether? What if his idea of a nice wedding was to take you in his car down to the court building and marry you, then afterwards, take you to an all you can eat buffet then drop you off at home before going to work? You'd probably feel like crap because of what those things actually sybolize. On a broader scale, people rarely admit the importance of appearance and how things look to friends, family, and colleagues.
I'd probably react by explaining how important the name thing is. If I had to beg, I wouldn't want to move forward because begging is not cool. If I had to beg about this, then there is no telling what else i'd have to beg for. Just my thoughts. Be good

MaCNCheese

You don't see the real issue here. You'd only understand my point if you could somehow understand that somethings are important to a potential spouse and when these things are disregarded by the fiance, it hurts. So, hypothetically speaking, what if a diamond ring and a fancy dress with a quartet string was important to YOU? If you didn't get those things, you'd be disappointed and therefore hurt. Furthermore, it's irrelevant to mention whether or not the groom or the bride is financially responsible for the wedding. (doesn't really matter who pays the bill) If the bride expects it and doesn't get it, she will be a bridezilla! Period.More importantly in this issue, is its IMORTANCE to either person. Obviously, if two people could care less about the jewelry, then it is not an issue - but thats not what we are talking about. Were talking about a situation in which one person values something and deems it important for the relationship, but the other does not.

MaCNCheese