Should I Move Away from My Family to Attend Law School?

[charlotteinmass]

Here's the deal... I've wanted to attend law school for TEN YEARS now. I'm 32 and married with a seven year old child, and my husband has a good job here in Boston. He absolutely cannot relocate due to the economy and his existing student loans. I applied to all the law schools in the area, but I was rejected from BU and waitlisted at BC. I really do not want to attend one of the fourth tier schools in the area, and I stupidly did not apply to UCONN before the application deadline.

I was about to give up on my law school dreams once again when I miraculously received a full tuition scholarship for students who plan to work in public interest... at a school that is 10 hours away from home.

With the encouragement of my husband, I deposited to this school. However, I am now extremely nervous and having second thoughts. How can I leave my family behind? I don't want my son to have psychological issues for the rest of his life. I worked as a social worker for several years and have seen the grim consequences of children from broken homes as well as those with negligent parents. A 15 year old girl I once worked with took her own life; as a child, she had to live with her aunts for three years while her parents were in law school (and I guess never got past the trauma).

I don't know what to do. Should I wait another year (and take the lsat for the third time in eleven years), or just take the bait and hope to transfer back in a year? 

[Ninja1]

You could probably defer at the school you're interested in until next year, apply to UConn and reapply to BC and BU next year, and take a year to think about it/get the details worked out if you do decide to go to the current front runner.

[just dot]

You could probably defer at the school you're interested in until next year, apply to UConn and reapply to BC and BU next year, and take a year to think about it/get the details worked out if you do decide to go to the current front runner.

Really good advice. 

Put 100% into studying for the LSAT.  Study until you know it inside and out.

I'm also a mother and I just finished up my 1L year.  I really don't think you should move.  Law school is incredibly difficult and if you're distracted by guilt and homesickness you aren't going to make it.  You'd be so much better off focusing your efforts completely on getting into BC.  If you were waitlisted once, chances are if you can bump that LSAT up a bit you'll get in. Treat studying like a job and put in HOURS and HOURS of focused study.

Don't worry about your age.  Not a problem, you're still young enough and you have plenty of time.  Also, if you have a supporive husband and a happy home that will be a huge advantage when you are in law school.  My kids live with me and I'm still a very active mother AND a successful student.  I don't think you should give up your dream, but there are better ways than moving away from your child.  You can never get that time back.  That's my very brutally honest opinion.
 

[LMUtalldrink]

what's wrong with Suffolk or Northeastern?  they're both in the top 100 in the nation... and in your city!  since you plan on staying in that market, these schools will suit you well.  it's only if you planned on moving to a different state where those schools were not well known that you would have problems getting a job. 
Living apart from your family for so long just is incomprehensible to me when Suffolk and Northeastern are VERY good options.  who knows - you may get $$ from them!
best of luck.

[new2law]

You mention neglected children in comparison to your moving to go to law school. Why couldn't your husband and kids move with you?
My wife and kid are moving with me.

Here's the deal... I've wanted to attend law school for TEN YEARS now. I'm 32 and married with a seven year old child, and my husband has a good job here in Boston. He absolutely cannot relocate due to the economy and his existing student loans. I applied to all the law schools in the area, but I was rejected from BU and waitlisted at BC. I really do not want to attend one of the fourth tier schools in the area, and I stupidly did not apply to UCONN before the application deadline.

I was about to give up on my law school dreams once again when I miraculously received a full tuition scholarship for students who plan to work in public interest... at a school that is 10 hours away from home.

With the encouragement of my husband, I deposited to this school. However, I am now extremely nervous and having second thoughts. How can I leave my family behind? I don't want my son to have psychological issues for the rest of his life. I worked as a social worker for several years and have seen the grim consequences of children from broken homes as well as those with negligent parents. A 15 year old girl I once worked with took her own life; as a child, she had to live with her aunts for three years while her parents were in law school (and I guess never got past the trauma).

I don't know what to do. Should I wait another year (and take the lsat for the third time in eleven years), or just take the bait and hope to transfer back in a year? 

[redcement]

"You wrote:  I am now extremely nervous and having second thoughts. How can I leave my family behind? I don't want my son to have psychological issues for the rest of his life. I worked as a social worker for several years and have seen the grim consequences of children from broken homes as well as those with negligent parents. A 15 year old girl I once worked with took her own life; as a child, she had to live with her aunts for three years while her parents were in law school (and I guess never got past the trauma).

I don't know what to do."


Sounds like you do know what to do. Or are you waiting for someone else to make a bad decision sound OK? Here's how that would go: Ignore your own personal experience! That's just cherry picking! You go to law school THIS YEAR ONLY dammit! You have been patient and studious and dreaming of it all for ten years. Eleven years is asking too much.

[WaveLaw]

what's wrong with Suffolk or Northeastern?  they're both in the top 100 in the nation... and in your city!  since you plan on staying in that market, these schools will suit you well.  it's only if you planned on moving to a different state where those schools were not well known that you would have problems getting a job. 
Living apart from your family for so long just is incomprehensible to me when Suffolk and Northeastern are VERY good options.  who knows - you may get $$ from them!
best of luck.

Prestige without family < modesty with family.   

[Ninja1]

what's wrong with Suffolk or Northeastern?  they're both in the top 100 in the nation... and in your city!  since you plan on staying in that market, these schools will suit you well.  it's only if you planned on moving to a different state where those schools were not well known that you would have problems getting a job. 
Living apart from your family for so long just is incomprehensible to me when Suffolk and Northeastern are VERY good options.  who knows - you may get $$ from them!
best of luck.

Suffolk and Northeastern are not good options unless you're getting some kind of scholarship.

[Ninja1]

what's wrong with Suffolk or Northeastern?  they're both in the top 100 in the nation... and in your city!  since you plan on staying in that market, these schools will suit you well.  it's only if you planned on moving to a different state where those schools were not well known that you would have problems getting a job. 
Living apart from your family for so long just is incomprehensible to me when Suffolk and Northeastern are VERY good options.  who knows - you may get $$ from them!
best of luck.

Prestige without family < modesty with family.   

Speak for yourself, poor man.

[WaveLaw]

what's wrong with Suffolk or Northeastern?  they're both in the top 100 in the nation... and in your city!  since you plan on staying in that market, these schools will suit you well.  it's only if you planned on moving to a different state where those schools were not well known that you would have problems getting a job. 
Living apart from your family for so long just is incomprehensible to me when Suffolk and Northeastern are VERY good options.  who knows - you may get $$ from them!
best of luck.

Prestige without family < modesty with family.   

Speak for yourself, poor man.

Ok... I did one month away from family (while looking for a place) and that sucked. I would never do a year, much less 3.