Q. What do a lawyer and a sperm have in common?
A. Both have about a one in 3 million chance of becoming a human being.
Q. What's the difference between a trampoline and a lawyer?
A. You take your shoes off to jump on a trampoline.
Q. Hear about the terrorist that hijacked a 747 full of lawyers?
A: He threatened to release one every hour if his demands weren't met.