^ I agree with the above three posts
I'm as qualified as any attorney; as I mentioned in my OP (original post), I have taken Contracts and can draft a fairly operative one that includes essentials such as the parties, the exchange (legally known as consideration), a merger clause (this is complex but there was a case I read about it concerning an unprofitable deli), and signatures.
The UCC will be inapplicable as this is a services contract (i.e. the service of offering my home as a vestige during the inaugural events).
For those interested, I will be receiving 600 dollars a night for 4 nights.