16 yo wants a job, please review my letter!

[rube]

Wow, people actually responded 

Vap, I like how you changed the letter (for the better of course). Mine was a bit too informational. So in the top you said:

                YOUR NAME
              address line 1 - address line 2

so my address in one line? Or split in two in one line? Or two separate lines? I'm confused.

Also I worked for my dad for a year, secretary work, so should I mention that in my letter or just leave it for the resume? It was for a mechanical engineering company.

I really appreciate your time!

[SASS]

I admire your foresight. I wish I would have been so focused when I was 16, or 18, or 20, or now.....

[StevePirates]

Also I worked for my dad for a year, secretary work, so should I mention that in my letter or just leave it for the resume? It was for a mechanical engineering company.

Your work experience will be on your resume.  Now, since you are so young, you may want to point out that you have "office experience" in your letter, but you don't want to just repeat your resume in your cover letter.

[StevePirates]

Interesting - I didn't know that etiquette.  Thanks for the info.

You're welcome.  When I was a kid I watched Bill n' Ted's Excellent Adventure and that got me curious to find out what an "Esquire" was.  So I learned about it.

But the reality is most people don't know the "proper" (aka British) way to use Esquire is.  How Esq. went from a station above "gentleman" to being shorthand for attorneys is a mystery to me. 

[EarlCat]

In the meanwhile, I want a job at a law firm. I just want to be a file clerk, something on that level, since anything beyond that would be above my realm of knowledge.

Please please PLEASE don't do this.  Every other f'ing law school application is from a paralegal.  Do something interesting that will make your application unique.

[Bulldog86]

In the meanwhile, I want a job at a law firm. I just want to be a file clerk, something on that level, since anything beyond that would be above my realm of knowledge.

Please please PLEASE don't do this.  Every other f'ing law school application is from a paralegal.  Do something interesting that will make your application unique.

I agree and disagree with this advice. I personally did pretty much this job (not really "paralegal", more like "intern" -- less substantive work) after both freshman and sophomore year of college. On the one hand, I do wish I had done something a little more interesting and branched out; BUT on the other, I'm very grateful to have had the experience of working in a law firm (even if not doing "real" legal work) so I could confidently say, yes, this is the career path I want to follow. While the office/firm that employed me was a good bit smaller than I hope my next employer will be, it still makes me feel a heck of a lot better about spending the time and money to go to law school.

So, rube, I say go for it. But also be on the lookout, in the upcoming years, for other experiences outside of an office.

[EarlCat]

I'm not knocking the experience part.  Yes, go find out what a day in the life of an attorney looks like... just don't pretend that the experience will enhance your application. 

For the application, do interesting things.   Participate in community service stuff--Habitat for Humanity or missionary work or something.  Go overseas and learn another language.  Major in bio-engineering with a minor in musicology or something.  In other words, stand out.

[MiamiHurricane]

1) Make him Mr. Doe, Esq.

Just a picky point, but I believe that Mr. and Esquire should not be used at the same time. It should either be "Mr. John Doe," or "John Doe, Esq."

[vap]

So in the top you said:

                YOUR NAME
              address line 1 - address line 2

so my address in one line? Or split in two in one line? Or two separate lines? I'm confused.

You can do it either way.  I just usually put both lines on same line.  For example:

John Smith
123 Nowhere Lane - Blackacre, XX 12345
(123) 456-7890 - john.smith@email.com

[vap]

Also I worked for my dad for a year, secretary work, so should I mention that in my letter or just leave it for the resume? It was for a mechanical engineering company.

Your work experience will be on your resume.  Now, since you are so young, you may want to point out that you have "office experience" in your letter, but you don't want to just repeat your resume in your cover letter.

+1