I don't feel I need to defend my genuineness, but there is truth to my original rant and my intention (beyond bitching my frustrations) is for people to truly do their homework before applying to law school. But to address Botbot....
- Winter graduation means OP had to either withdraw a semester or fail multiple classes... (Tulane only offers full time and does not charge by the credit hour)
Correct, I dropped out for a semester due to a family tragedy.
- OP already knows the billable hours and pay of a firm he hasn't interviewed for
As I said before, I used Tulane's reciprocity agreement with SMU Law and applied to the firm from their job posting. Botbot ask OCD about the BYU job posting website, Tulane has reciprocity with most law schools if you don't believe me. The firm listed their minimum billable requirement at 170/month (so really about 2040/year).
- OP found a firm that takes "applications"
Again, it came from SMU.
- OP doesn't understand Dallas mass transit
Yes I do as I am from here. There is the DART, but most of the non-biglaw firms are not near a DART station. I can take the bus, but as I remembered it in high school, the buses were always behind schedule.
- Even Dallas PI/ID firms don't require 2000+ billables
I am not familiar with the PI/ID firms here, but I know of a couple of firms requiring 2000+ billables beyond the firm I applied to including Bicker & Brewer and Barron & Budd
- OP had BIGTEX and now works at Starbucks
Unfortunately this is correct, however I was not a biglaw firm but at a specialty boutique firm. I only applied to Starbucks in addition to my bartender job because I thought it would only be temporary (plus I could work part-time while I was studying for the bar). No job materialized since the bar, so I am sticking with Starbucks until something comes up.
- OP makes no mention of severance or post termination assistance (BIGTEX firms offer fantastic assistance to the people they lay off to preserve their name)
Again, not bigtex but I did have a severance (hence using my savings to pay off my loans). However, since I never started working as an associate at the firm, my severance package was only for one month's salary.