Law School Discussion

State of Black Marriages....

Re: State of Black Marriages....
« Reply #30 on: May 29, 2005, 05:57:26 PM »
Lady I definitely hear what you’re saying about gay men..brothas locked up etc… I don’t know what works for everyone else.. but I stayed single for three yrs… I didn’t even date.. I’m not saying that I wasn’t lonely.. nor am I saying that I wasn’t miserable at times..but it was something that I had to do because I refused to settle for someone.. or just be physical because of the needs and desires of my flesh… I’m not saying that works for everyone because not everyone can have that kind of discipline.. but it worked for me and I’m a lot happier now knowing that I waited instead of messing around with random guys and looking back over my life like.. “damn why did I even bother with that brotha”…

Scurred I feel what you’re saying..perhaps I wasn’t fully being clear.. I’m not by any means saying that all women are settling and not stepping up to the plate.. there are a lot of us that are single now because we won’t boggle down and get the bottom of the barrel man..  and I commend all women that do that…

It’s a sad place to be and like you said the numbers (we’ve had this discussion before) are so stagnate between black men and women that it’s sickening.. all I can say is hold on and continue to pray for that man to come into your life..

elegantpearl01

Re: State of Black Marriages....
« Reply #31 on: May 29, 2005, 06:01:36 PM »
I know Rashid too, but I think he's done a lot of growing..irrespective of his personal life, I do think the line in the song is tight and profound (much like I can like R. Kelly without thinking about his "lifestyle").  

I do think sisters are settling...look at that tired magazine Essence, they are always printing stories about "I married the Janitor and I'm happy" ...you don't see that message being sent to men...

A lot of sisters are alone because they can't find someone to settle with that's bearable...I know of too many educated women, with professional degrees that are with some sapsucker that ain't worth the salt in his bread.

Re: State of Black Marriages....
« Reply #32 on: May 29, 2005, 06:05:57 PM »
$9.99 that's in my budget ;)


Lady it came out last Tuesday, it's SOOO hot...all cds are 9.99 today & tomorrow at Circuit City.

Ladyday

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Re: State of Black Marriages....
« Reply #33 on: May 29, 2005, 06:14:14 PM »
"I married the Janitor and I'm happy" ...you don't see that message being sent to men...

That's why "sistas need to step up" just doesn't sound right. See what I mean?

Re: State of Black Marriages....
« Reply #34 on: May 29, 2005, 06:17:47 PM »

hell yeah it contributes to it..patience is a virtue..


I wonder if the "man shortage" contributes to sistas settling? 

elegantpearl01

Re: State of Black Marriages....
« Reply #35 on: May 29, 2005, 06:19:47 PM »
IMO I think sisters get tired and settle for less than what they want or they change their priorities...but men NEVER have to do that...a man can have one tooth a jherri curl, but if he has some long money and is willing to spend it he can get a pretty decent sister, who'll claim she's not in love with his outer beauty, it's his inner beauty...I suppose women could start caking men, but who wants to do that??

There's a definite shortage of eligible brothers, I can remember at the beginning of every semester in law school women prowling the concourse trying to see who the new cuties were so they could pursue that MRS degree...I can think of only 2 black couples who got together in law school and later married...and both of those women had to put up with some trifling behavior from their now husbands...

HBCU.EDU

Re: State of Black Marriages....
« Reply #36 on: May 29, 2005, 06:22:29 PM »
ok..so, would you ladies date a man that doesn't have a college degree? let's say he got into a 4yr school and you already have your *&^%. will you date him while he is in undergrad?

elegantpearl01

Re: State of Black Marriages....
« Reply #37 on: May 29, 2005, 06:26:04 PM »
ok..so, would you ladies date a man that doesn't have a college degree? let's say he got into a 4yr school and you already have your sh*t. will you date him while he is in undergrad?

Not if he was in undergrad, I'm 30, I assuming he'll be a little too young for me....i could date someone in law/med school though

HBCU.EDU

Re: State of Black Marriages....
« Reply #38 on: May 29, 2005, 06:27:54 PM »
ok..so, would you ladies date a man that doesn't have a college degree? let's say he got into a 4yr school and you already have your sh*t. will you date him while he is in undergrad?

Not if he was in undergrad, I'm 30, I assuming he'll be a little too young for me....i could date someone in law/med school though

what if he is 30 and in undergrad?

scurred1

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Re: State of Black Marriages....
« Reply #39 on: May 29, 2005, 06:35:46 PM »
ok..so, would you ladies date a man that doesn't have a college degree? let's say he got into a 4yr school and you already have your sh*t. will you date him while he is in undergrad?

If I were single I'd have to say it depends. I know a couple of guys in my church who run their own business but didn't graduate college. It all depends on the guy. You can have a lot of drive, intelligence, etc. but just not do well in an academic setting. If he'd done well in his life up till that point and decided later that he wanted to get a college degree for whatever reason that would be fine.