Law School Discussion

Nine Years of Discussion
;

Author Topic: Anyone moving away from their significant other for school?  (Read 5588 times)

littletanuki

  • Sr. Citizen
  • ****
  • Posts: 136
    • View Profile
Re: Anyone moving away from their significant other for school?
« Reply #40 on: April 23, 2005, 01:59:53 PM »
Think of it like being a military family: you do what you gotta do, because it's right. (On the upside, however, neither of us has increased odds of dying due to our separation...)

I very clearly identified myself as being a part of a military family, and mentioned that my husband has been deployed to both Iraq and Afghanistan in my post on this thread.  Being part of a military family involves much more than "doing what you have to do because its right."  It also involves receiving a phone call during which you are told no one can confirm whether your husband is alive or dead and the subsequent waiting for hours praying for the phone call that finally confirms that he is alive.  Everytime my husband deploys we have to discuss "final arrangements", update his life insurance and make sure his will is current.  I live with the reality that he might die during our separation every single day, and I found your analogy not only in extremely poor taste, and but dismissive of what military families deal with on a regular basis. 

Jaimalia82

  • Full Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 47
    • View Profile
Re: Anyone moving away from their significant other for school?
« Reply #41 on: April 23, 2005, 03:28:42 PM »


I very clearly identified myself as being a part of a military family, and mentioned that my husband has been deployed to both Iraq and Afghanistan in my post on this thread.  Being part of a military family involves much more than "doing what you have to do because its right."  It also involves receiving a phone call during which you are told no one can confirm whether your husband is alive or dead and the subsequent waiting for hours praying for the phone call that finally confirms that he is alive.  Everytime my husband deploys we have to discuss "final arrangements", update his life insurance and make sure his will is current.  I live with the reality that he might die during our separation every single day, and I found your analogy not only in extremely poor taste, and but dismissive of what military families deal with on a regular basis. 
Quote


I agree.  I only hope I can have as much strength as you did when my boyfriend deploys for the first time this summer.

koggy

  • Guest
Re: Anyone moving away from their significant other for school?
« Reply #42 on: April 23, 2005, 04:24:49 PM »
If I go through with this law school thing, I will not only be leaving a husband 2.5 hours away, but also 2 kids.  If my husband doesn't work, I can't go to school at all, because he is paying for it (and he can't get a job elsewhere because he is an engineer in the nuclear field, those jobs aren't exactly plentiful!) So, I am attending the closest school to our home (unfortunately it is in a different state).  So, I will be commuting a lot to see my family.  I don't know how in the world this will work with study time, but we'll see.  Can anyone top this one?

jacy85

  • LSD Obsessed
  • *****
  • Posts: 6859
    • View Profile
Re: Anyone moving away from their significant other for school?
« Reply #43 on: April 23, 2005, 04:40:25 PM »
I very clearly identified myself as being a part of a military family, and mentioned that my husband has been deployed to both Iraq and Afghanistan in my post on this thread.  Being part of a military family involves much more than "doing what you have to do because its right."  It also involves receiving a phone call during which you are told no one can confirm whether your husband is alive or dead and the subsequent waiting for hours praying for the phone call that finally confirms that he is alive.  Everytime my husband deploys we have to discuss "final arrangements", update his life insurance and make sure his will is current.  I live with the reality that he might die during our separation every single day, and I found your analogy not only in extremely poor taste, and but dismissive of what military families deal with on a regular basis. 

I really feel for what you and your husband and family go through each time your husband is deployed.  But to be completely honest, the woman who made the analogy was in no way trying to demean what you go through, nor do I feel she had any intention of insulting anyone.  You make sacrifices, and I great appreciate the men fighting for our country and their families who support them and miss them.  But preaching is unnecessary, and I found it vaguely insulting.

littletanuki

  • Sr. Citizen
  • ****
  • Posts: 136
    • View Profile
Re: Anyone moving away from their significant other for school?
« Reply #44 on: April 23, 2005, 05:19:33 PM »
I very clearly identified myself as being a part of a military family, and mentioned that my husband has been deployed to both Iraq and Afghanistan in my post on this thread.  Being part of a military family involves much more than "doing what you have to do because its right."  It also involves receiving a phone call during which you are told no one can confirm whether your husband is alive or dead and the subsequent waiting for hours praying for the phone call that finally confirms that he is alive.  Everytime my husband deploys we have to discuss "final arrangements", update his life insurance and make sure his will is current.  I live with the reality that he might die during our separation every single day, and I found your analogy not only in extremely poor taste, and but dismissive of what military families deal with on a regular basis. 

I really feel for what you and your husband and family go through each time your husband is deployed. But to be completely honest, the woman who made the analogy was in no way trying to demean what you go through, nor do I feel she had any intention of insulting anyone. You make sacrifices, and I great appreciate the men fighting for our country and their families who support them and miss them. But preaching is unnecessary, and I found it vaguely insulting.

You're right.  Preaching is unnecessary, and it was not the intent of my post to do so.  I wasn't trying to garner sympathy either.  I posted a response because I wanted to let the OP know that there are people who really deal with the situation she mentioned, and to treat it as being similiar to her own was callous, intentions or not.  I felt making a joke about increased odds of dying was insensitive and wanted to make it clear that I, as a member of the community in question took issue to it. 

I'm sorry if anyone found my post insulting.  There aren't too many things that get me riled up, but this did, and I felt I needed to say something. So I did.

That's all.  Now back to your regularly scheduled post.  :)

BAFF213

  • Guest
Re: Anyone moving away from their significant other for school?
« Reply #45 on: April 23, 2005, 05:22:58 PM »
I've decided to go to school in Boston, which means leaving my boyfriend behind in CT.

I will be in Boston, he will be in Chicago.

What school/s in Boston?  I may be attending Suffolk this fall.

InVinoVeritas

  • LSD Obsessed
  • *****
  • Posts: 5550
  • Fine! I shall also fix zee hobo suit!
    • AOL Instant Messenger - NVinoVeritasChi
    • View Profile
Re: Anyone moving away from their significant other for school?
« Reply #46 on: April 23, 2005, 05:49:40 PM »
from the outset, my SO and decided we wouldn't be living apart when law school started.  for both of us, the value of being together outweighed the benefits i may realize from going to a "better" school or a school that offerred more money but was in another city.  fortunately, things largely worked out.  i'll be turning down some generous scholarship offers, but i'll be going to a great law school nonetheless.  he gets to keep his job (and the promotion he recently got), and we don't have to worry about relocating.

ScurvyWench

  • Sr. Citizen
  • ****
  • Posts: 1606
    • View Profile
Re: Anyone moving away from their significant other for school?
« Reply #47 on: April 24, 2005, 09:35:48 PM »
i think that, barring very rare exceptions, a non-marital relationship should not dictate where one goes to school.  i just can't see the sense in it, and have heard far too many "i went there to be with him/her and i hate myself for doing it" stories.

maybe i've been listening to my mother too closely lately, but if it's meant to be, it will be ;)

You're forgetting that girls in their mid-to-late 20's are starting to freak out.  The old "if I don't find a person I want to spend the rest of my life with in college I'm never going to get married" syndrome. 

I think that the girls desperately seeking marriage are scary and don't get married because they're so desperate to do so. The girls who aren't in a rush (I was in no hurry and didn't want to get married-EVER!) end up finding the right person and getting married. It's much easier to fall in love with someone who is independent, has drive, and their own goals than it is to handle someone whose sole purpose seems to be getting married.

(I know, this added nothing to the distance discussion. And no, I'm not doing long distance, my husband and I are both moving to Houston.)

princesssnadia

  • Sr. Citizen
  • ****
  • Posts: 155
    • View Profile
    • Email
Re: Anyone moving away from their significant other for school?
« Reply #48 on: April 25, 2005, 10:46:15 AM »
i think it's better to make the split now that waiting closer to the fall. it will give u time to get over it. you dont wanna do it in the middle of the semester, you'll be depressed and it'll be hard to concentrate on anything.

---------

  • Sr. Citizen
  • ****
  • Posts: 303
    • View Profile
Re: Anyone moving away from their significant other for school?
« Reply #49 on: April 26, 2005, 01:11:08 PM »
My wife will very likely stay in Houston if I move. Beat that.

My husband will be two hours away. I lose. :)