Yale, finally, and my 250

[twarga]

Exactly.  Now you got it, Tex!  My mother tried to live vicariously through each of her 4 daughters and was disappointed in each one of us.  Now that I'm a mom, I can see how easy it would be to slip into that mindset.  I haven't done it myself, but I can see where she was coming from now.  I did some stupid cr@p when I was younger, and made choices that made her cringe (Air Force, anyone?).  I didn't fully understand why she obsessed so much until I became a mother myself. 

[BigTex]

Exactly.  Now you got it, Tex!  My mother tried to live vicariously through each of her 4 daughters and was disappointed in each one of us.  Now that I'm a mom, I can see how easy it would be to slip into that mindset.  I haven't done it myself, but I can see where she was coming from now.  I did some stupid cr@p when I was younger, and made choices that made her cringe (Air Force, anyone?).  I didn't fully understand why she obsessed so much until I became a mother myself. 

I think it's easy for you to see how easy it is to slip into that mindset because you were habituated to that mind set to begin with. For those of us raised by parents that didn't try to shape us in their own image there is very little temptation to do so with our own children.

With respect to the OP's and your comment, I do not understand how any loving parent can be "disappointed" in a child for deciding to become a lawyer or join the Air Force. Concern about the choices a child makes? Sure. If my child decides to become an artist (  ), I will have concern for his future and may suggest he also take some computer classes just in case, but I will still have tremendous pride in his accomplishments (however minor) as an artist. "Disappointment" is an incredibly cruel and selfish parental reaction. I understand *that* it occurs, just as i understand that, say, child abuse occurrs, but I'm concerned about people expressing empathic underderstanding for either of these activities in any sense that would legitimize them.

[twarga]

If my child decides to become an artist (  ), I will have concern for his future and may suggest he also take some computer classes just in case, but I will still have tremendous pride in his accomplishments (however minor) as an artist. "Disappointment" is an incredibly cruel and selfish parental reaction. I understand *that* it occurs, just as i understand that, say, child abuse occurrs, but I'm concerned about people expressing empathic underderstanding for either of these activities in any sense that would legitimize them.

Disappointment in your children (at times) is not necessarily cruel.  My 10 y.o. brought home 3 Bs and a C on her report card this quarter (not one A).  She's been more interested in her hair, her friends, her dolls, etc. than her school work.  I was disappointed and I told her so.  That does not mean I don't love her, it means that I care enough about her to be disappointed, not just gloss over it with a kiss and a lollipop.  Hopefully, she'll try harder in an effort to please me, and find that the rewards for doing well are like ripples in a pond.

She wants to be a beautician when she grows up.  I've said nothing but, "Whoo hoo!  Then I can get my hair done for free!"

[BigTex]

Ironically, my parents are anything but proud of me. That's an entirely different story, though.

I didn't understand why my parents were disappointed in me until I had kids of my own.  Another mitzvah awaits you, my dear.

Your later comments seemed more reasonable. In the quote above, however, you seemed to imply that the OP is immature, naive, or somehow the fault lies with her in feeling consternation with her parents' decision to express disappointment in their daughter's desire to become a lawyer. My feeling is that this is in no way the child's fault and she should not just buck up and get prepared to learn this hard lesson herself. Insofar as her parents express disappointment in her decision to become a lawyer, they are not being good parents. My comments were merely intended to counteract the negative view you seemed to be expressing toward the OP.

[twarga]

Ironically, my parents are anything but proud of me. That's an entirely different story, though.

I didn't understand why my parents were disappointed in me until I had kids of my own.  Another mitzvah awaits you, my dear.

Your later comments seemed more reasonable. In the quote above, however, you seemed to imply that the OP is immature, naive, or somehow the fault lies with her in feeling consternation with her parents' decision to express disappointment in their daughter's desire to become a lawyer. My feeling is that this is in no way the child's fault and she should not just buck up and get prepared to learn this hard lesson herself. Insofar as her parents express disappointment in her decision to become a lawyer, they are not being good parents. My comments were merely intended to counteract the negative view you seemed to be expressing toward the OP.

Hey, if her mom is anything like my mom, then she doesn't know how to keep her opinions about ANYTHING to herself.  Puhleeeeze, my mom expressed her joy, pain, disappointment, etc. to anyone who'd listen.  But I digress...

At no point did I say that she was at fault for anything.  All I was saying is that she'd be able to view her parents' disappointment from another angle once she becomes a mother.  Jeez, Louise, Tex... it really is you.  This is proof that you are not the fake Tex, but the real mccoy!  Now I'm DONE arguing this point with you.  I'm sure we'll find something else to wrangle about later.

[racheles05]

Ironically, my parents are anything but proud of me. That's an entirely different story, though.

I didn't understand why my parents were disappointed in me until I had kids of my own.  Another mitzvah awaits you, my dear.

I don't understand why you assumed I'm not a mother. I've only posted about a million times about my son. Shows how boring my posts are! Nobody reads them! Maybe it's a reaction to the intense pressure my parents have put on me my whole life, but I can't imagine being disappointed in my son the way that my parents have been disappointed in me. This is a different story though. I put the 250 up there for informational purposes only; see what Yale doesn't want, and maybe give people ideas for next year.

[amelus]

Because what grandmother did for me was a mitzvah. Also, there's the other meaning, commandment, that relates to the coming of age ceremony for Jewish kids. This was sort of a coming of age story.

i understood what your grandmother did was a mitzvah (and a very nice one at that!).  my question was why it is the title of your peice.  the other meaning...commandment doesnt refer to coming of age in general, but i guess you mean when added with pre-fix bar or bat?  but i see what you were trying to get at.  anyway, like i said...great story.

[racheles05]

I wouldn't go so far as to say that is what Yale does not want.  That was a fabulous PS, and probably exactly the kind of thing Yale DOES want.  Unfortunately, your LSAT was well below their averages, and no almost no PS can make up for that.

Thank you so much! Yeah, my LSAT sucked. I make no bones about that, but hey, I did my best being a single mommy, running away from hurricanes, and babysitting my step-niece on top of it. Eh, whatever. I'm happy about FSU and if my 250 can help someone with decent numbers craft something that will get them into Yale, that would be awesome.

[dakota2K]

Yale ding received this morning via email.

3.93, 172, went complete 2/25 for anyone still keeping track.

Good luck to everyone still in the running!