I'm getting hard.

[Italian2L]

Congratulations, you are now a republican...

Things aint so bad on this side, food's great, beds are warm and guns are cheap. All you have to do is to make your genitals believe you are a democrat, and it will all be fine...

Plus, us conservatives are more intriguing and amazing lovers... hippies are wussies.

Nice post, but I have to say that conservatives are definitely NOT more intriguing and amazing lovers. My experience is that conservative chicks, and I'm talking about real conservative chicks, not the ones who only vote republican because they went to private school and thats what mommy and daddy and everybody else does, are stuffy and cold and only want it once a week and always make you wear a condom even though you've been dating for a month and both have been tested and she's on the pill and then they ask about how many women you've been with and get all pissy if its more than 5, and blah blah blah.

Hippy chicks, on the other hand, are usually down for whatever but are too drugged out half the time to want to do it and you have to deal with the fact that no matter what she's down for, hitting it sans rubber is just not an option because odds are that she's also banging some dude with dreadlocks that smells like patchouli and who happens to be banging ten other herpe hippies.

This is where the chicks who wear suits but vote democrat come in. Loose enough morals to be freaks in the bed, but socially aware and with a sufficient amount of pride in their personal hygiene to stay away from Dreadlock Dave and his little buddy syphillis. Also, they are ALWAYS ready to do it because they need to loosen up after spending all day with their butts clenched smiling through their teeth when co-workers talk about politics.

....Yeah, I've put a lot of thought into this

[crazymofo]

Congratulations, you are now a republican...

Things aint so bad on this side, food's great, beds are warm and guns are cheap. All you have to do is to make your genitals believe you are a democrat, and it will all be fine...

Plus, us conservatives are more intriguing and amazing lovers... hippies are wussies.

 smells like patchouli

I swear, it's total chance that has me gazing upon my own offspring of a post tonight...and also has me scratching my head at this peculiar resurgence of hippie bashing. The "patchouli smell" putdown has surely made a discernable comeback.

I recall Colbert mocking his mocking of hippies smelling of patchouli a few times. Perhaps this is the reason for the slur resurfacing in a notable number.

Very well.

And for the record, "discernable turgidity" has been positively identified in the greater Denver metro area (I live in California), so the catch phrase is spreading and is sure to be featured in a small town near you soon!

[uma]

correct me if i am wrong (i've never been in law school) but that's pretty much the law school material, isn't it?

[Italian2L]

As a whole, Republicans are better in bed:

New 'Primetime Live' Sex Survey Reveals That More Republicans (56 Percent) Are Very Satisfied With Their Sex Lives Than Democrats (47 Percent).

Of those involved in a committed relationship, who are very satisfied with their relationship?
Republicans — 87 percent; Democrats — 76 percent

Who is very satisfied with their sex life?
Republicans — 56 percent; Democrats — 47 percent

The poll analysis also reveals who has worn something sexy to enhance their sex life:
Republicans — 72 percent; Democrats — 62 percent

When asked whether they had ever faked an orgasm, more Democrats (33 percent) than Republicans (26 percent) said they had.

The survey results are that more men identify themselves as Republicans and men are more likely to say they are sexually satisfied and enjoy sex "a great deal."

The American Sex Lives 2004 survey was conducted by telephone August 2-9, 2004, among a random, anonymous, national sample of adults 18-99 years old. The results have a 2.5-point error margin for all respondents; as in any poll, sampling error is higher for subgroups.

Check out the web-page:
http://abcnews.go.com/Primetime/News/story?id=180291


Take that, you hippies

A few thoughts on why this survey doesn't necessarily prove that republicans are "better lovers."

First of all, the survey simply doesn't answer the question debated here because it doesn't account for how much inter-party sex is occurring. Clearly some must be occurring. Also, sexual satisfaction is not necessarily related to the other party's sexual performance anyway. Sex is a drug, the more you have and the better it is, the more you want.

Second of all, since the survey indicates that there are more democratic women and more republican men and that men in general were more likely to be satisfied, there are basically two possible explanations for why democratic women are the least satisfied of the bunch.

First, its possible that the surplus of democratic women are sleeping with the surplus of republican men and are so disatisfied because republican men are the worst lovers. The second possibility is that the surplus democratic women are sleeping with the few democratic men and are dissatisfied because they are only recieving a percentage of the democratic man's sexual attention because he is paired up with other democratic women due to the surplus.

In either scenario its clearly best to be a democratic man because 1) you're a man so you're more satisfied and 2) either you are a better lover than republican men and so you get your pick of the litter OR you have a number of mistresses.

[Italian2L]

It was supposed to be funny, but I guess I got a little too carried away

[Italian2L]

It was supposed to be funny, but I guess I got a little too carried away

parts were, no doubt, but for anything that long you should probably supplement them with cliffnotes next time.  this way, people actually take the time to read/understand what you're saying.

Point taken. Unfortunately, law school has destroyed my ability to be concise.

[crazymofo]

My idealism makes me lean towards anarcho-syndicalism (bit of a class warrior).  My pragmatism makes me lean towards the Democrats (out of moral necessity).  I don't smell of patchouli, I look like a Young Republican, and I shag like a cornered badger.

Where's the G-Damn column for me?

...stupid narrow sex studies.

[Happy_Weasel]

My idealism makes me lean towards anarcho-syndicalism (bit of a class warrior).  My pragmatism makes me lean towards the Democrats (out of moral necessity).  I don't smell of patchouli, I look like a Young Republican, and I shag like a cornered badger.

Where's the G-d**mn column for me?

...stupid narrow sex studies.

Heck, you're not alone. Just remember that.

[revelareveritas]

Hey crazymofo - I completely identify with what you're going through.  I was completely excited about coming to law school.  I've always been pretty laid-back and able to take stress in stride.  By now, I'm a frazzled neurotic capable of going from zero to female dog in about three seconds.  It's hard for me to break out of the law, because I'm consumed by it.  I find myself identifying less and less with my "non-law" friends...and those lovely other students who attend law school with me are people I'd really rather not be around outside of class.  Television doesn't interest me.  I think I'm slowly becoming "the crazy lady next door who talks to her cats."

You're avatar frightens me, Trouble... *wimper*

[inthelaw45]

T4, my friends, T4.  I've found that mostly my classmates are a bit older and have LIVES outside of school, which makes them all-around nice, balanced people.  The truly obnoxious souls generally think of themselves as "too good" for a T3 or T4 (if you need proof pls see the pre-law board) so they won't be in your company.  You'll mostly be with people who are grateful to be in law school.  They don't think they are the smartest people on the planet, but they are hard workers.  Also, you tend to avoid the trust-fund rich preppy kids if you go to a state school or public institution (that could be a T1 or T2).