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Author Topic: send PS's my way  (Read 824 times)

dubsy

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send PS's my way
« on: January 14, 2008, 09:33:36 PM »
i have time to kill, please feel free to send.
seeing king midas everywhere.

dubsy

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Re: send PS's my way
« Reply #1 on: January 15, 2008, 08:55:06 PM »
but please only send if you are willing to take brutally honest advice. thanks.
seeing king midas everywhere.

t L

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Re: send PS's my way
« Reply #2 on: January 15, 2008, 09:00:04 PM »
Should I send mine?  I'm curious for feedback.

This is one PS that I would love to read. 
Michigan 2L

dubsy

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Re: send PS's my way
« Reply #3 on: January 16, 2008, 03:14:20 AM »
Should I send mine?  I'm curious for feedback.

if you'd still like to, sure.  but i'm not sure how credible you'd find what i have to say...  ;)

besides, you already sent yours in! i'd feel bad saying anything other than exuberant praise.
seeing king midas everywhere.

ManaKarma

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Re: send PS's my way
« Reply #4 on: January 16, 2008, 12:51:56 PM »
thank you very much for your feedback.  i definitely am going to use some of your suggestions... especially making some sentences more clear.  I like my Hunter reference because it gives the reader something concrete to remember... not writing in 3rd person there are so many "I's" amongst the thousands of essays, that having a person (who people may or not know of, but somewhere from their "generation") might evoke some sort of emotion.  I think taking it out of the intro might be a good idea though... thanks again

dubsy

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Re: send PS's my way
« Reply #5 on: January 16, 2008, 07:16:07 PM »
thank you very much for your feedback.  i definitely am going to use some of your suggestions... especially making some sentences more clear.  I like my Hunter reference because it gives the reader something concrete to remember... not writing in 3rd person there are so many "I's" amongst the thousands of essays, that having a person (who people may or not know of, but somewhere from their "generation") might evoke some sort of emotion.  I think taking it out of the intro might be a good idea though... thanks again

you don't necessarily have to kill it in the beginning. personally, i like circular endings like yours but it takes more than a common theme at the beginning and end for it to be effective.  feel free to re-send after you revamp, i am in dire need of any form of intellectual stimulation...
seeing king midas everywhere.

authority11

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Re: send PS's my way
« Reply #6 on: January 16, 2008, 07:46:45 PM »
Hdubs, I'm gonna send you a rough draft of mine.  Let the dogs out and let me know if you have any ways to shorten it.  It's at 3 full pages at the moment.

dubsy

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Re: send PS's my way
« Reply #7 on: January 17, 2008, 08:16:09 PM »
I'm still a reader for anyone who needs!
seeing king midas everywhere.

nikoi

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Re: send PS's my way
« Reply #8 on: January 18, 2008, 12:02:38 AM »
I just PMed you, but not sure if it was sent. Can you confirm that you got my PS? Thanks.