So by falling for the social pressures and hype, you force yourself to get a FAKE diamond ring, and that doesn't make you superficial?
Thats an interesting attempted reversal, but it fails. Here's why.
People expect you to have a shiny rock on your hand, virtually all people. They'll ask you wtf is wrong with you if you didn't buy your wife a ring. They will not, however, ask you how much the ring cost, so if it only cost you a grand yet it looks like a 30k ring, nobody is the wiser, and you've saved a bundle.
I suppose you could go full monty and not buy an engagement ring at all - but I'm simply advocating saving money, not bucking the social norm. Either way is okay, just don't go spend 30 grand on a shiny rock.