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Messages - loki13

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51

omg youre ME!

except i wasnt horrified, and i dont have an offer


eta:  expect later drunken tasha postings.  just saying.

Yeah, not sure how that makes it. No one is more shocked by my offer than I am. I came to law school to fight the man; now I am the man.


52
I'm just going to throw this out on this thread and see if I can get a like-minded response.

(FWIW, It's cold, and I can't find my socks, but that is probably because I'm more of a flip-flop kind of guy)

First semester I cared so deeply. I bled the law. I studied, worked,ate, slept, and joked the law. I did the same second semester. Then I repeated the process first semester second year. But I received my SA position, and things tailed off. Now it is my third year, and I have my offer (and my firm is doing well, so no worries) and I noticed the following last semester:

As a side note, I began with the vow that I wasn't going to slack- that I'd care deeply- but . . .

1. I didn't do a single outline for a single class.

2. I never completed a single reading assignment for one class.

3. I didn't know what my exam schedule was until the week classes ended, and was surprised to find I had a conflict (two weeks after the date for reporting said conflicts).

4. For the life of me, I know I took five classes, but I can only recall four of them right now. I guess I could look them up.

I realize that there is a 3L slide, but I was truly horrified. I think it hit home when I had a three day break before one of my exams (for a class I hadn't read much for, hadn't had great attendance for, and was really difficult subject matter) and instead of studying, I chose to catch up season 2 of Dexter.

Thoughts, feelings, party favors?

53
Where should I go next fall? / Re: 152/4.0 Harvard or Yale?
« on: January 05, 2009, 03:40:12 PM »
Hey!
I do not like you lawschool brat
I do not like you and your frat
I do not like you at the shore
I do not like you drunk on Coors
I do not like your average life
I hope you do not take a wife
I hope you don't decide to breed
Cause that's one thing I do not need

I do not like you radical
I hate you and your fancy school
You're wrong about the working class
I hope they kick your Harvard a$$
I do not want you on this world of ours
I'd rather live on planet Mars
And die from lack of oxygen
Than breathe the air of other men
Hey!

So, uh, yeah- go to Yale.

54
Law School Applications / Re: Chances at G'Town Scholarship?
« on: January 05, 2009, 02:14:05 PM »
Jahwol. Corrected the egregious error.

It should make you feel better. Your personal statement will not win you admission to a school (unless your personal statement begins, "Last summer when I was vacationing with the Dean of your admissions office and President-elect Obama, I was asking my father what school he would donate his extra ten million dollars to . . . .")

In all candor, most schools have a matrix. There are numbers that are auto-admits (unless you get *creative* on the personal statement, have a bunch of felonies etc.) and there are numbers that are auto-dings. Then there is a small number of fence-sitters. For those people, they will actually look at your file, consider extra-currics yada yada yada. But there isn't a single admissions officer who will say, "You know, they had a 178 LSAT and a 3.9 UGPA in chemistry, but their personal statement was sort of bland. Maybe Tom Cooley isn't the right place for them."


55
Law School Applications / Re: Chances at G'Town Scholarship?
« on: January 05, 2009, 01:41:47 PM »
1. Repeat after me- nobody cares about your personal statement. Nobody. You are not a unique and beautiful snowflake. The personal statement exists for three reasons:

a. To weed out people who chose not to spell check, cannot write coherent sentences, or otherwise are incapable of stringing two words together successfully.

b. To find those risk-takers who send in videos, write about their drunken spring exploits in Cabo, or send in an audiotape with a mock-epic rendition of their personal statement. Then those people are discarded. Lawyers are risk-averse; next time, apply to business school.

c. To allow people to think that they are more than the sum of their LSAT + UGPA.

2. Do not look for a scholarship to GULC. They should not pay your tuition to go there; they should pay you to go there as a 1L. Why not do what everyone else does? Go to a crappy TTT lawschool where they pay you a stipend and transfer to GULC as a 2L. They take anyone with a pulse at that point, and, if you pay a little extra, I've heard that the pulse "requirement" is optional. Word on the street is that next year, they'll allow you to send in a grand and they'll let you paste "G'Town" over the name of the TTT school that you currently have on your diploma. It's part of their new 4L transfer program.

56
General Board / Re: Tactless or Gunner?
« on: January 05, 2009, 12:58:41 PM »
Amazing!

Despite the well-known existence of the law-school gunner, exgratia hass found him(her)self in a unique and enviable situation.

Simply put, exgratia managed to be placed in a class full of people who are ignorant of the law and unable to answer questions. Exgratia is doing the class a selfless favor by taking the horrible duty of answering the Professor's questions himself, because clearly, the rest of the ignorant dolts in the class couldn't fathom the brilliance that is exgratia. Soon they will be erecting statues and singing songs of greatness, extolling the virtues of exgratia!

Oh exgratia,
How great thee are,
I wish I knew the difference between horizontal and vertical privity
And could expound for hours with my ability
Knowing that your helium hands will rise
Oh exgratia, for thee I roll my eyes!

57
General Board / Re: Tactless or Gunner?
« on: January 05, 2009, 10:54:13 AM »
Perhaps you're basically correct, but not caring what other people think does not make someone a sociopath.  Not caring what other people think can be a symptom of anti-social behavior, which is indicative of a sociopath, but it is far from determinative.   

BINGO!

58
Where should I go next fall? / Re: UF 3L - Will Answer Questions
« on: January 05, 2009, 10:48:15 AM »
Here's my answers to your questions, but remember this caveat- these are all my (well-informed and correct) opinions. I recommend getting a spread of opinions.

1. I also went to a small (Northeast) liberal arts undergrad. Gainesville was not a culture shock. The size of the university (dealing with the bureaucracy at times) can be, but not the culture of the town.

2. More on Gainesville- G'ville is a college town, like Athens, or (not as cool, but still) Austin... you get the idea. We have UF, and Shands (medical center) and, uh, UF. It's a great place, but go to far away (Waldo, Stark, Chiefland) and you're in a whole 'nother universe.

3. Social options- UF Law is kind of cut of, physically and culturally, from the rest of the University. If you like the undergrad party scene, there's a lot of that. There's some cultural options, more than you'd find in most cities this size, because of UF. There's plenty of sports etc. But you're in law school- you won't be taking too much advantage of that. If you like the BigCity(tm) this is the WRONG SCHOOL to go to.

4. There's a lot more to do than football; again, think of typical college town options.

5. Beaches are a weekend option (Daytona/St. Augustine) but they are a hike (~2 hrs.). East Coast options for beaches aren't so hot (Cedar Key isn't really one). So- it's definitely doable, but it's not an after-class kind of thing.

6. Given the current job market (dire, but hopefully better by the time you graduate) I will give you the piece of advice: go to UF. Seriously. If you are getting in-state tuition, it is a steal. FSU goes up and down in the rankings, sometimes coming close, but it is nowhere near UF in terms of perception in the state and perception in the region.  Law school is what you make of it, and FSU is a fine school, but UF's alum network is just better.

7. Facilities are okay. They're relatively new and they're about to finish a new moot court / trial building. The library and many of the classrooms were also recently built.

8. The student body is not competitive. Well, they are competitive in the sense that law school is relatively competitive, but it just isn't cut-throat. Students help each other. Part of this is because nobody (NOBODY) fails at UF. So you get a few students competing for the top honors, but all the top students know each other, so it's more of a friendly competition.

59
General Board / Re: Tactless or Gunner?
« on: January 05, 2009, 09:57:29 AM »
Quote
I'm actually borderline gunner in some of my classes, but I don't think it pisses anyone else off.  Even if it does, I don't care.  The classes that I tend to have gunner tendencies are those classes where the Prof. doesn't cold call.  When he just asks a question and nobody answers, inevitably I raise my hand because I either know the answer or to give him a springboard for what the correct answer is.  I do try my best to not be annoying and I often joke to other people that I'm a gunner.  Sitting in class with nobody answering the Prof.'s questions is just so boring.  However, if other people are raising their hands, I usually am quite content to just keep my trap shut.  And I have never sent out a mass email.   

Listen, here's the thing. If you can't spot the gunner in the first half hour of the class, then you ARE the gunner.

There are two kinds of gunners- those who are gunners and just don't care (the sociopaths) and those who really just don't realize they are (the clueless). It is very easy to fall into the second category; here are some common symptoms:

1. But I find this so intellectually stimulating, and I just want to learn more!

2. Everyone else in the class is so quiet, I feel bad for the professor; someone has to keep the class going!

3. I joke with other people that I'm a gunner, therefore I can't be one because I have a sense of humor about it (unlike the sociopath type of gunners).

Here's the reality of it- in the very long run, we're all dead. In the less long run, it doesn't really matter if you're a gunner or not. This is unlikely to come up in any Senate confirmation hearings. However, do not delude yourself into thinking that you're not "one of those types" and that the other students don't have their bingo boards set up with you as a prominent feature.

60
General Board / Re: Should I be really worried?
« on: January 05, 2009, 09:48:31 AM »
It's so funny you mention this. Just yesterday, something happened to me that had me thinking about these sorts of events. You see, I am a major partner at Seymour, Monet & Grabbit and I was just involved in some major litigation against some namby-pampy "Friends of the Pandas" or somesuch; my client had a pressing need for more parking lots. Anyway, as a sort of back-story, I had attended an ivy league law school with a forced curve of a D, back before they instituted all of these "touchy-feely" policies of pass/fail and force B- curves that don't let my firm know who earned their grades with their family connections and what poor people deserved their D- grades.

I digress. My first grade I received at UpperCrust U. was, to my horror, a D MINUS! Yes, below the curve! Apparently, the Professor must have summered in Nantucket and not the Vineyard and didn't recognize my patrilineage, but the shock never left me. Nevertheless, I soldiered on and received straight A (ttaboy')s the rest of my time in those hallowed halls, and fastracked to partnership where I'm at.

So, I make a phenomenal closing, all about the need for parking lots, and the inconvenience of walking, and how pandas or lemurs or whatever are really just four-legged poop bags that will turn on us and eat us as soon as they get the chance. The jury is in my hands. I am getting ready for my usual post-trial victory ritual- a $300 steak, a $10,000 bottle of wine, and then rolling around naked in a vault of my money while pleasuring myself to the recorded lamentations of associates working on Christmas.

And then the opposing counsel stands. He says, "Members of the jury- how can you listen to him? In his first class of law school, he got a grade that was BELOW THE CURVE!" They all looked at me, and they started laughing, howling, tears running down their cheeks. Opposing counsel sat down; nothing more need be said. I had lost. The scarlet D- was on my head.

So yes, you should be worried.

And yes, this grade will haunt you forever.

And yes, I will have opposing counsel killed.

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