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Messages - Troy

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David, who says personal ads opened up a world he never knew existed, thinks he's seen it all. "I've met movie directors," he says, "actors, attorneys, judges, priests, clergypeople ... it's phenomenal what actually goes on." He adds that many of the men he's been involved with are, publicly at least, happily married. Though they risk having their secret lives discovered, his benefactors have dined with him in public many times, David says. "I don't want to sound holier-than-thou, but I can sit at a nice restaurant and exhibit the proper manners. Granted, there are some people who aren't educated or don't have the class to be with these people. But when I put on a coat and tie and sit down for dinner, I don't exactly look like a flaming fag."

Asked what he believes people would think about him if they read about what he does, David pauses.

"My mother knows I have a sponsor," he finally says. "She's okay with it, for the most part. She wishes her son didn't need to rely on anybody for money. She knows I'm going to school. That I'm trying to better myself. I am HIV-negative. I pay all my bills and study hard. And I happen to have somebody -- okay, more than one person -- who is very generous to me. They care about me and want to see me succeed. You can get a different answer on this from me, depending on what day of the week you ask. If somebody is thinking about doing something like what I do ... I would advise against it. It's not a healthy thing for your soul or mind. Whatever situation you get in, you're relying on somebody else for your living. No matter how generous they are, you have to rely on someone besides yourself. It could end at any moment. One or both of my sponsors could croak, and where would I be? I'd be an overaged hooker trying to get back to something."

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An older man feels he maintains youth by having someone around who is younger. And there are men—both homosexual and heterosexual -- who simply like to pay for sex and for favors. They enjoy buying clothes or a convertible or dinner at expensive restaurants. Why? To show off. To maintain youth. To be allowed to live vicariously through the eyes of youth. One guy in his 70s, a wealthy lawyer who is not "out" about his sexual orientation but enjoys the company of young trophy boys. Takes off and flies to Las Vegas or Hawaii with these boys. And then tires of this one particular boy. It happens. So he takes on another boy. But he still continues to take care of the first one. He is in a position where he worried about the possibility of blackmail. It happens...

Blackmail is just one reason to fear ramifications if you're a wealthy businessman who has young trophies in the closet. Being looked down on by peers and shunned by high society are others. A reason not to be concerned, however, is legality. It is not against the law to maintain a Cunananesque relationship, according to Lieutenant Jim Duncan of the San Diego Police Department's vice unit. "Keep in mind that this is something that occurs not only in the gay community but also the heterosexual community," says Duncan. "Repeated solicitation of the same prostitute does not constitute a legal relationship. That's against the law. But the idea of a 'kept' relationship is that it is a long-term solution where one person supports the other. It's not prostitution. It may be money for sex, but usually there is more consideration shown in these long-term relationships." Though perfectly legal, daddy/boy relationships -- quietly more common than most people realize -- are made public in mainstream San Diego about as often as rain showers in the Anza-Borrego Desert.

It's nothing new for older gay men to be attracted to attractive people. If they have power and position, some want a trophy person to make them look good. To a large extent, the gay community puts a high premium on physical appearance. Older people often get overlooked.

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Some older men feel unable to go to the gay clubs that attract the youngest crowd because there's this perception that older gay men are going after young boys and the minute an older man goes near a young man, they're branded as pedophiles.


It's not because they are branded as pedophiles that they can't go to the gay bars .. it's because they are branded as gay that they don't go to those bars ..


David is a kept boy. This year, he’ll collect $50,000 from two much older male sponsors who pay him for sex and companionship. It's a thriving underground industry, David says. And he's far from alone in taking care of business. Rich, closeted gay men—in La Jolla and moneyed communities all over the world—pay big bucks to maintain discreet liaisons with younger (though legal age), pay-for-play boys. The practice, many would say, differs only in degree from the straight-world version of older wealthy males collecting younger "trophy" wives or girlfriends. The difference: The mainstream has—fundamentally, if not wholeheartedly—embraced the latter as a socially acceptable inclination.

David (not his real name) lives in Hillcrest. The money he quietly receives via bank drafts goes in large part toward college tuition, he says. In addition to the money, David's sugar daddies lavish him with gifts—like the Cartier watch draped on his wrist, the latest in computer hardware, and the furniture that adorns his home. And they wine and dine him at tony spots like the Hotel del Coronado and Le Meridien, or downtown's La Strada and Fio's. Not bad for someone with no full-time job, per se. Especially since before becoming a trophy boy, David was a hooker. There's a difference, he says. He met both sponsors through classified ads. "At the time, I was hooking. I'd been hooking for two years. Just four days after putting an ad in national classifieds I was in New York. Days later I was in Phoenix. I was flown out to places sight unseen—except for a small picture that ran with my ad. A $56 ad made me so much money. Both of my sponsors first called me strictly on a sexual basis, but then took a liking to me."

Though he won't name names, David says his benefactors are prominent and wealthy businessmen. "There are so many wealthy gay men who will pay for companionship from younger guys," he says. "It's a whole circuit. The people that do this are the most powerful in America. It's unbelievable. It can be married men in high-level positions. Very, very wealthy men. To this day it still surprises me when my friends tell me who they're sleeping with. Or when these men appear as guests on Larry King Live." In agreeing to meet face to face with a reporter, David asked that his physical description be kept to a minimum. Suffice to say he could easily be cast as a pool cleaner on Melrose Place. His shoulders stretch the elasticity limit of a white Gap T-shirt. Though his visage is nearly fawn-like, David's close-cropped hair lends an appearance slightly reminiscent of Kept-Boy-of-the-Year Andrew Cunanan.

"It's fun when I deposit $30,000 in my account in one month. But as far as it being fun and exciting to be with an older man—it’s not. They’re not fun to hang out with. When one of my sponsors wants me to go with him to the Ritz-Carlton Laguna Niguel for a weekend -- and I'm not due to get any money from him for two months -- I wonder if it's really worth it. After I've already received a chunk of money, I really don't feel like being bothered."

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General Board / Re: The Biography of a Dangerous Idea
« on: July 09, 2007, 12:02:40 AM »
LOL ayn, I know what ya mean! ;)

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General Board / Re: practicing law as a non-U.S. citizen
« on: July 09, 2007, 12:01:46 AM »

Find some lousy woman, they usually do it for around $5K. Most marriage fraud involves one transaction: A US citizen accepts a one-time payment to actually marry the foreigner. Usually they sponsor the immigrant, go through with a wedding, and live as roommates, or at least set-up a joint home and accounts that make them appear to live together. It is these cases which are the hardest to uncover, since doing so would require a great deal of private investigation and manpower.


Be careful, however! My neighbor is being deported back to his native Check Republic because during his AOS procedure they discovered he had entered the country on a fake B-2 visa. They were reviewing all the visa applications made in Prague between 1999 and 2002 at the time when Alexander Meerovich served as a consular officer (eventually he pled guilty to visa fraud). He acknowledges that he sold at least 85 fraudulent visas over a two year period while serving as deputy consul general at the US Embassy. This neighbor tells he paid a Check citizen working in the Embassy some $10,000 to get the visa. Looks like they were all in the game, the consular officer himself included.

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General Off-Topic Board / Re: Do you still talk to your EX?
« on: May 25, 2006, 07:32:19 PM »
My ex lives in Texas and I'm in Oregon.  We still get together every six months or so as a sort of reunion.  We're meeting in La Jolla in June.  Should be fun.  Plus, we both date other people and there's no hard feelings.  I think it's easier stay in touch with an ex when you live far away from each other and don't have to deal with the daily grind, jealousy, or the possiblity of getting back together.  Come to think of it, it's probably my best relationship right now.

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I don't think I'll get into Oregon.  They have a small class size and there won't be many students withdrawing.  I have been successful at getting off waitlists at lower tiered schools but Oregon would be much tougher. 

This fall, I'll be living in Windsor.  I've heard that it's considerably nicer than Detroit (that's according to a bartender at the Racoon Lodge in Portland, OR - he overheard my table's conversation last weekend and jumped in  :) ).  We can exchange phone numbers on email and talk later.  How serious are you about Vermont or environmental law?

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Last year's tuition was around 22,500.  They haven't set tuition for the incoming class yet.  The tuition breakdown was 8,500 CDN for U-Windsor and 14,800 USD for UDM.  I've emailed you the scholarship info.  You've probably been to this site but check out http://www.jdllbprogram.com/.  It has tuition info, a summary of the program, and a listing of required courses.  Also know that summer school is required for all one Ls at the end of their first year.

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Where should I go next fall? / Re: Dizzy from the mailbox. Help!
« on: May 22, 2006, 11:43:32 AM »
EMSR,
While you're answering the JD/LLB questions, how is the public transportation in Detroit? Is a car a necessity?
Thanks.

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Toogie,

I'll be attending the JD/LLB program in the fall.  I've considered going to school for a year and transfering.  One issue with the JD/LLB program is that many of the first year courses are taken at U-Windsor.  Those credits may be difficult to transfer to another school in the states.

What I find most appealing about UDM's joint degree program is their graduates seem to have a lot of flexibility with where they work.  U-Windsor has a high placement rate in Toronto, and last years' grads ended up everywhere from Washington (state) to New York.  Most lower tiered schools (including UDM's traditional JD) are very regional.  A financial incentive I stumbled upon is that U-Windsor offers all US citizens in the JD/LLB program a 6,000 scholarship - which I'm assuming you'll qualify for.  Last year's JD/LLB tuition was also considerably less than UDM's traditional JD program because U-Windsor costs less.  In all, 22,500 v. 25,500.  With the reduced tuition and the scholarship, the JD/LLB program is going to be cheaper than just about anywhere.  Comparing UDM with Vermont is difficult.  If you're really, really interested in environmental law, go to Vermont.  They have a good reputation in that field of law.  If you're interested in business or international trade, I'd probably say UDM.

Good luck choosing!  If you want me to forward my emails from the Windsor financial aid office I'd be happy to.

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