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General Board / Re: What's The Difference
« on: June 12, 2006, 06:43:35 PM »
Did you hear that the Post Office just recalled their latest stamps? ...
... They had pictures of lawyers on them ... and people couldn't figure out which side to spit on.

How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer? She has an uncontrollable craving for baloney.

How does an attorney sleep? First he lies on one side, then he lies on the other.
 
How many lawyer jokes are there? Only three. The rest are true stories.

How many lawyers does it take to change a light bulb? How many can you afford?

How many lawyers does it take to screw in a light bulb? Three. One to climb the ladder. One to shake it. And one to sue the ladder company.

What do you call 25 skydiving lawyers? Skeet.

What do you call a lawyer gone bad? Senator.

What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 50? Your Honor.

What do you throw to a drowning lawyer? His partners.

What does a lawyer use for birth-control? His personality.

What happens when you cross a pig with a lawyer? Nothing. There are some things a pig won't do.

What's the difference between a lawyer and a vulture? The lawyer gets frequent flyer miles.

What's the difference between God and a lawyer? God doesn't think he's a lawyer.

Did you hear about the terrorists who took a whole courtroom full of lawyers hostage? They threatened to release one every hour until their demands were met.

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1. Law school engenders greed and intellectual myopia.
2. Law school breaks people. It is experienced as a trauma, an assault. If law school changes people, it is rarely for the better.
3. Law leads to self-loathing, mental illness and substance abuse.
4. Law uses fear and shame as a motivating force.
5. With the help of the bar exam, the law school graduate is nothing but a licensed fraud.
6. Law is crowded and full of despair.

This may sound elitist, but 4th tier private law schools generally put many of their graduates in despairing situations where they cannot pass the bar or get a job or both, but they are still saddled with loads of debt from paying 25k+ per year in tuition.
 

http://www.lawschooldiscussion.org/students/index.php/topic,2385.msg28310.html#msg28310

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