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Author Topic: fairly depressing  (Read 2958 times)

newy

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Re: fairly depressing
« Reply #20 on: January 09, 2005, 11:35:37 AM »
Scarlett Johannson = Stanford  :-*

vmersich

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Re: fairly depressing
« Reply #21 on: January 09, 2005, 11:38:46 AM »
I don't think Angelina Jolie = Yale.  I think Christian Bale does. 

A. Jolie = NYU

Brad Pitt = Duke

Harvard = Johnny Dep

Stanford = Bjork (circa 1993)

Interestingly, Bjork now = Vanderbilt.

Virginia is unmatched with a celebrity.

Scarlett Johanson = WUSTL, for obvious reasons.


newy

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Re: fairly depressing
« Reply #22 on: January 09, 2005, 11:43:52 AM »
So then who's Stanford now, if not SJ?

And, she resents being called WUSTL.

vmersich

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Re: fairly depressing
« Reply #23 on: January 09, 2005, 11:48:18 AM »
stanford = that lady from Breakfast at Tiffany's.

BigTex

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Re: fairly depressing
« Reply #24 on: January 09, 2005, 12:26:47 PM »
If Jennifer Aniston and Brad Pitt - two of the most genetically gifted individuals on the planet, and seemingly talented and decent people as well - can't make it together...well how bloody depressing is that?

:(

My theory on why these two, and many married couples, divorce:

You first meet that guy/girl. Your heart is racing. It's like an obsession commercial - passion, intrigue, mystery, romance, white lace flowing everywhere - an irresistable conglomeration of the most seductive human emotions. Unfortunately, most kids mix that cra*p up with true love.

But here's a news flash - the obsession commercial thing - it's unsustainable. It does not, will not, cannot last. So, if that's what you're looking for, if that's the basis of your marriage, you are doomed to divorce. It doesn't matter how brilliant your partner is, how intriguing he/she is, how good looking he/she is - after you spend years and years with this person you will know ALL his/her secrets and discover that his/her sh*t stinks just like everybody else's. There is NOTHING he or she can ever do to ever surprise you again. You will NEVER EVER EVER again get butterflies in the stomach from kissing this person. The obsession commercial is OVER.

What is true love? True love is when the above happens and you don't care - you STILL want to be with the person.

Unfortunately, too many stupid kids fall head over heels with each other during the obsession commercial phase of the relationship and decide to get married, and in doing so they've sealed their doom. The best you can hope for them is that they don't have kids before the high octane MTV-fake-romance cra*p runs out.

I knew I was truly in love with my wife and we would be together forever when the following happened:

We had been living together for 3 years. We had graduated from college a year or so earlier. We were both completely into our first jobs. We had let ourselves go. We were both fat and the stress was wearing on our faces. We both looked pretty darn bad compared to our "glory" days in college. We were sitting on the couch, watching TV after a long day of work, and sharing a bag of potato chips. I looked over at her, she looked over at me, and we were both thinking the same thing - so i just said it.

"Hun ... you've gotten fat and ugly and there's nothing about you I don't know ..... and i don't give a damn. I love you."

swagger

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Re: fairly depressing
« Reply #25 on: January 09, 2005, 12:39:44 PM »
Wow, Tex, I found that post highly depressing.

BigTex

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Re: fairly depressing
« Reply #26 on: January 09, 2005, 12:47:50 PM »
Wow, Tex, I found that post highly depressing.

I honestly don't know why. I couldn't imagine a better relationship than the one i have w/ my wife. It's perfect. I come home from a hard day's work and I know i have a solid rock there for me. Similiarly, she comes home and knows she has a solid rock there for her. I've had the obsession romance stuff. That stuff gets old and lame after a while. The absolute WORST thing i can imagine is coming home after work and suddenly having to go into mega don-juan leather and lace mode - all in an effort to squeeze just a few more drops of adrenalin out of the relationship. To me, nothing is more depressing than THAT. And, i bet that's what happened with this hollywood couple and so many others. The spark is gone, they equate the spark with love, and they split the scene as soon as the heat is gone.

You know, it didn't used to be this way. There was a time when marriage was looked at as a partnership. A man and woman got together to work the fields together, work together to make a home, raise a family, see their grandkids thrive one day. THAT was the definition of true love - the entire process of being together throughout all phases of one's life.

But then Lord Byron and the rest of the 18th & 19th century romantic artist dorks came along. They were the original MTV generation. They convinced everyone that true love = hot fiery romance. They made the first obsession commercial and conned everyone into believing it.

It's so sad seeing the poor saps who continue to buy into the myth.

Dolcejn

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Re: fairly depressing
« Reply #27 on: January 09, 2005, 01:02:22 PM »
Tex, I understand what you're saying - really.  Some of the initial spark has to go out of a long-term relationship (and thank God - honestly, huge passion also means big passionate fights and misunderstandings).

But at the same time, I want to be more than a "rock" to my boyfriend, at least until I'm 50 or 60.  We lounge around in sweatpants and rent movies and cook together, but we make sure to get dressed up and go out, or buy each other surprise presents every now and then. My parents do the same thing for each other.  I'm sure this is part of your marriage as well, and it is so important to keep alive.  Because in addition to falling in love with the person because he or she is a beautiful person inside, we all find these people beautiful on the outside as well (whether it's the figure, or eyes, or smile) -- this is obviously not as important as what kind of person your partner is, but I know I would be crushed if I thought my boyfriend was with me simply because he thought I'm a great person, but that he didn't think I was all that pretty.  I know I'm just in a relationship (2 and a half years and counting) and not a marriage, but it's hopefully long-term.  And there's nothing better than looking at my boyfriend while he's not watching, and thinking to myself, "Wow.  How did I get so lucky?"  Because he's the whole package.

I have a feeling that you agree with me, and that you were mentioning a particular moment in your relationship to emphasize that in the end (as in, at your worst moments, and when you're old and tired), all that matters is who you are.  And that has less than nothing to do with what you look like.
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BigTex

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Re: fairly depressing
« Reply #28 on: January 09, 2005, 01:03:32 PM »
Also, one of the biggest cons of Lord Byron and his gang was convincing everyone that passion was exclusively bound up with sex and romance. You see that lingering to this day and it prevents many people from their full artistic development.

So many men complain about missing passion and excitement in their lives. What do they view as the solution? You guessed it - get a passionate and exciting love affair going.

For me, i do not look at my wife as responsible for generating passion and excitement in my life. that's my own responsibility. her responsibility is to support me, as i must also do for her. I find passion and excitement through hiking, camping, and wrestling - things my wife has no part in. But so many people get such incredible tunnel vision: "MUST FIND HOT MATE TO BRING PASSION INTO MY LIFE!". They miss out on a whole panorama of experiences that would more genuinely do so. No to mention, they're being irresponsible jerks by trying to pawn off the generation of passion in one's life to someone else rather than where it belongs - YOURSELF!

BigTex

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Re: fairly depressing
« Reply #29 on: January 09, 2005, 01:11:03 PM »
Dolcejn, i agree with much of what you said. But i just simply don't ever see couples whose underlying problem is that they support each other too much. But on the other hand, i do see lots of couples whose underlying problem is that they expect the relationship itself to be the source of passion and excitement and view the partner as responsible for the other's excitement and passion. So, i mention the things i do because i simply never see the pendulum swinging too far in the other direction.